Advice from three of our guy friends. This week a straight woman asks, “Do guys ever notice a woman’s shoes, or care whether or not she wears heels?”
Straight Married Guy (Ben): I will never understand women’s ability to differentiate between very similar items of clothing and pairs of shoes. I get wanting to shop for Ara shoes online, but it can really confuse me. My wife has about 17 black sweaters that all look alike to me. Every time she comes home with a new black sweater I’ll say, desperately, “You already have about 17 black sweaters!” And she’ll say, “Yes, but look at the buttons on this one. So cute!” According to what I notice, there are three different types of shoes – flats, high heels and boots. I rarely notice flats (unless they’re super ugs). I mostly notice high heels (though mostly by always noticing legs, ass and height, which high heels seem designed to maximize). And I always notice boots, because women in boots are badass. But overall, shoes are just one part of a woman’s overall style that’s either working or not. The components aren’t as important as the complete package.
Gay Single Guy (Bradford Shellhammer): Yes. Guys do notice women’s shoes. Gay guys! We notice the heel height. The brand. If they’re appropriate. If you can walk in them. If they are current season. And we judge you. So, dress to impress ladies! Straight men, on the other hand, do not notice shoes. Well, actually, some do — weirdos with fetishes. But most straight men don’t look at your shoes. They look at your legs. The shoes helps the legs so you still want to make sure you’re wearing the right shoes. You have two groups of guys to impress. I don’t envy that.
Straight Single Guy (Max): Oh heck yes. You put a girl in Chucks and then that same girl in heels and I guarantee you that every straight man in the world will notice the difference. This is not to say that I don’t sometimes prefer girls dressing in sneakers, but good legs in heels? It’s enough to drive you mad. Also, my friends and I have repeatedly ranted about how little we care for UGGs. What is this fad? College girls seem to think that sweatpants + gigantic furry boots = something more than comfort and I’m here to tell you that you’re wrong. (Although yes, I
know they’re incredibly cozy). If you’re super hungover and chilling with your girlfriends then I get it, but if I showed up to a date wearing Crocs and cargo pants would you actually be into it? I hope that you have more fashion sense than that.
Our “wise guys” are a rotating group of contributors, some of whom wish to remain anonymous and some of whom like the attention. This week’s Straight Married Guy is Ben, a writer and artist living in Los Angeles who runs AdultParlorGames.com; our Gay Guy is fellow SUN blogger Bradford Shellhammer, the creative director of fabulis and a New York Times featured decorator; and our Single Straight Guy, Max, is a recent college grad in New England. To ask the guys your own question, click here.
