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Tell Us About Your Relationship and Win an Intimacy Kit Worth $500!

April 16, 2013


photo via Durex

We’re seeking a US-based couple in their twenties or thirties, either married or in a committed relationship, who are willing to tell us about their relationship — anonymously, if you prefer! In exchange you will receive our undying gratitude — oh, and an awesome “Play Together, Stay Together” toolkit from Durex, worth five hundred dollars, which includes sensual products, restaurant and spa gift certificates, tips, thought-provoking questions, and other items to help you and your partner get closer to go further. We will interview you once before you receive the kit — over email or phone, whichever you prefer — and once after you’ve tried it out for a couple of weeks.

You should be:

  • A couple — either married or in a committed relationship
  • In your twenties or thirties
  • Based in the U.S.
  • Willing to talk to us about how getting closer as a couple has enabled you to go further together — not just physically, but emotionally, too
  • Willing to try out the tips and products in Durex’s ”Play Together, Stay Together” toolkit — and then tell us how it went
  • Willing to have those interviews published on our site (anonymously, if you prefer)

You will get:

  • A free ”Play Together, Stay Together” toolkit from Durex worth $500, including a vibrator, lube, condoms, body chocolate, a mixology kit, a Truth or Dare game, gift certificates for Restaurant.com and SpaFinder.com, and more!
  • The chance to get even closer to your partner… and to go a little further together
  • The chance to tell the story of your relationship


  • Send us an email at contest@emandlo.com telling us why you want to take part — we can’t wait to hear from you! (Optional: Include a pic of yourselves.)


Moms Are Kinky People Too

April 4, 2013


Lelo’s Etherea Silk Cuffs

Mother’s Day is just around the corner! Sure, you could get her some nice flowers…again. Or you could get her something she’ll really enjoy: our new book, 150 SHADES OF PLAY: A Beginner’s Guide to Kink!

Here us out: Mom’s loved the Twilight series, but secretly wished there was more sex in it. Along comes the Fifty Shades series, which is essentially Twilight fan faction, and there’s tons of sex….kinky sex. Moms across the country go gaga for it, so much so that it’s dubbed “mommy porn.”

There are just a few problems:

  • Fifty Shades doesn’t tell moms how to incorporate any of this stuff into their own lives
  • it doesn’t mention specific quality products or where to get them
  • it perpetuates myths about kink
  • it even promotes some very dubious (i.e. unsafe) behaviors and techniques

A mom friend of ours recently wrote us, saying she’s been married for a loooooong time and needs some new ideas, asking which book of ours we would recommend. We told her 150 SHADES OF PLAY: while it does cover some intense kinky stuff, it also covers the basics; it’s not visually graphic; it has a great sense of humor, which makes it fun and non-intimidating to skim with a husband or partner; it gives readers a vouyeristic look into how extreme some people can get with BDSM which might make them feel more comfortable and confident to try new, mildly kinky things. Because let’s face it: a little toy or light bondage is nothing compared to pony play!

So when making the mom in your life a Mother’s Day care package this coming May, remember: flowers are nice, but floggers are nicer.

LELO’s Smart Wands Win the 2013 Red Dot Design Award!

March 19, 2013


Medium Smart Wand in plum by LELO

Pop the champagne! Our friends over at LELO have just gotten word that their Smart Wands Cordless Body Massagers have been awarded the Red Dot Design Award for Excellence in Product Design—their second Red Dot in as many years, with their couples’ massager Tiani bringing home last year’s honor.

Regarded as the highest praise for product design – over 4,500 world-renowned brands were in the running for this year’s prize – the Red Dot is a prestigious, internationally-recognized quality seal given to the world’s most groundbreaking, pioneering products since 1955. This year’s judges included famed fashion designer Jimmy Choo, as well as representatives from a number of high-profile international brands.

LELO‘s Smart Wands, powered by SenseTouch™ technology, feature nifty little touch sensors that cause vibration strength to increase upon contact with the skin, mimicking the sensations of a massage therapist. Equipped with integral, rechargeable Li-ion batteries that emit whisper-quiet vibrations, the Smart Wand™ has been dubbed the most powerful fully-waterproof and rechargeable cordless body massager in the world.

The Red Dot Award is already LELO’s fourth major award win this year—having previously being named Pleasure Product Company of the Year and singled out for Excellence in Product Packaging at January’s XBIZ Awards, not to mention their Insignia collection being crowned Best Product Line for Women at the AVN Awards the same month.

LELO representatives will be officially presented with the 2013 Red Dot Design Award on July 1, 2013 when the Smart Wands are inducted into the Red Dot Design Museum in Essen, Germany, where Tiani™ is proudly being displayed.


Lelo Turns 10!

March 4, 2013


Happy Tenth Anniversary to LELO, our favorite pleasure object maker (and our dear sponsor). In honor of their big 1-0, they’ve created a virtual tour of their company history, from a Stockholm living room to 25,000 retailers worldwide. Did you know that when LELO attended their first trade show in Las Vegas, what started as a slow trickle of visitors to their booth soon became a line over 200 meters long? Neither did we ’til we took the tour! But we’re not surprised — LELO products demand that kind of attention. And do you know the coolest thing about this anniversary? You can use it as an excuse to treat yourself to a nice little anniversary present!



Lingerie, Lelo & Love: We’re at the NYC Curve Expo THIS SUNDAY!

February 22, 2013


If you’re in New York this weekend, here’s a fun outing: the CURVE EXPO at the Jacob Javits Center, America’s biggest lingerie & swim suit trade show (Feb 24-26). Our sex-toy besties, LELO, are hosting booth #D8 with all their newest pleasure objects and intimate apparel.

And they invited us to join the fun on Sunday! From 11 to late afternoon on Feb 24th, we’ll be at the LELO booth signing 150 copies of our new book 150 SHADES OF PLAY, which LELO is generously offering with their compliments to retailers (i.e. for free!). First come, first served!

If we’re not at the LELO booth, come find us in the area reserved for men’s underwear, or else in the luxury flannel pajama corner trying to score some swag in exchange for sex advice!

Last Chance to Order “150 SHADES” for Valentine’s Day!

February 12, 2013


Tantra Feather Teaser by LELO

Don’t miss out on the chance to give the MOST entertaining, romantic, kinky, informative, funny, sexy, outrageous Valentine’s Day gift this year! Our NEW book 150 SHADES OF PLAY: A Beginner’s Guide to Kink is available on Amazon. Here are the deadlines you have to beat this week to get your copies by February 14th:

For more information about our new baby, 150 SHADES OF PLAY, visit its beautiful new website: 150ShadesOfPlay.com.

Top 4 Reasons Why the Grammys Are Infinitely Better Without T&A

February 11, 2013


photo via Jezebel

When we began watching the Grammys last night, we had not gotten the memo – the email that CBS had sent out to participants advising them to adhere to the Network’s wardrobe policy:

Please be sure that buttocks and female breasts are adequately covered. Thong type costumes are problematic. Please avoid exposing bare fleshy under curves of the buttocks and buttock crack. Bare sides or under curvature of the breasts is also problematic. Please avoid sheer see-through clothing that could possibly expose female breast nipples. Please be sure the genital region is adequately covered so that there is no visible “puffy” bare skin exposure….OBSCENITY OR PARTIALLY SEEN OBSCENITY ON WARDROBE IS UNACCEPTABLE FOR BROADCAST.

We had no idea! As we watched the show, we began thinking: Wow, there’s something different about this Grammy’s show. It’s actually good. The music is amazing. The performances are compelling. Everyone looks so cool (except for Katy Perry, who looks like she was supposed to be at the AVN awards).

Once J. Lo made a reference to “the memo,” we finally figured it out. Now, we’re usually not ones for censorship, or curtailing freedom of expression. And we don’t love CBS’s politically conservative, anti-gay history. But we’re also not ones for the excessive objectification of women, the virtual requirement of almost all female celebrities to put their bodies and sexuality on display for the male gaze (and the female gaze, thank you women’s magazines). So here are the 4 big reasons why a break from that was a decidedly good thing:

1. Sex wasn’t where you didn’t want or expect it.
There is something to be said for the compartmentalization of displays of sexuality — to be able to find sexy and sex-related material when you want it (hello, EMandLO.com!), but not to be choked by it whenever you turn on the TV (or at least network TV), pass billboards, or check-out at the grocery store. Musicians can still have sex-filled videos and dress provocatively at provocative events, but it was nice to see the world through G-colored glasses when so often we’re forced to wear PG-13 glasses.

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2. The stage was an equal playing field.
We’d like to think the “wardrobe advisory” actually, ironically, gave the female celebrities more freedom — in other words, the freedom not to be sex objects for a night. That didn’t mean anyone had to forgo glamour or style, it just meant both the men and women looked cool. They were musical equals you could take equally seriously. Because let’s be honest, nobody was taking Pink seriously when she imitated a live water birth 25 feet in the air while wearing that outfit from The Fifth Element during the 2010 Grammys.

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3. The show was family-friendly.
It’s great to have a star-studded musical event be (mostly) appropriate for kids —  and one that’s not, for lack of a better word, dumbed down for them. The more boys and girls see America’s equivalent of “heroes” in roles that aren’t automatically sexualized — and sexualized in such a narrow way (i.e. men = fully clothed sexual aggressors, women = semi-naked sexual objects) — the better chance they have of growing up with decent (i.e.  respectful, self-respecful, egalitarian, feminist, fair) attitudes about sex.

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4. The focus was on the music.
Sideboob, nip slips, ass crack, etc are totally distracting. You have an autonomic, Bugs-Bunny-esque, eye-popping (or other body-part-popping) reaction which consumes your attention. (For example, was Rihanna even singing during this performance at the 2011 Grammys? We couldn’t tell you!) Shows like these have come to trade in over-the-top performances that rely more on shock value than musical genius or ingenuity. But last night’s Grammy show let the music shine. Talent rather than tit was on full display.

Need a Last Minute Valentine’s Day Present? 150 SHADES OF PLAY Will Spice Up Your February 14th!




Last Chance to Enter Our “Adore Me” Contest (Odds of Winning Are Great!)

January 28, 2013



To help us all get in the mood for Valentine’s Day (fast approaching, in case you hadn’t noticed, ha), we want you to “share the love”: Use the comments section below or email us (select “Contest Entry” from the pull-down menu) BY EOD EST TUE JAN 29TH, to share something cute/romantic/cheeky about your current relationship — or your favorite former relationship, if you’re currently single. Maybe it’s your meet-cute story, or a date that went hilariously wrong (and you stayed together despite this), or the moment when you knew this person was for you. Go ahead, make us all swoon! (But please, no Penthouse Forum-style entries.)

The WINNER — our favorite response — will receive a free ADORE ME SET by LELO — this includes a stylish red lipstick vibe, a red silk blindfold, red silk and suede wrist restraints, and a satin storage pouch. Best of all, we’ll get this gift shipped out to you in time for Valentine’s Day! Oh yeah, and the winning story will be featured in a post on this site — so you can get some love back for all the love you shared, aw yeah.

The contest is open until January 29th. Feel free to post anonymously, of course — just be sure to include your email address in the comment submission form below (this will NOT show up on the site) or in the email submission form so we can contact you if you’re the winner.

Okay… Dish away!

Read more about the Adore Me set here . . .

Happy MLK Day!

January 21, 2013

1 Comment

photo by emdot

Did you know that only about a third of employers in the U.S. observe Martin Luther King Day as a holiday? So we’re doing our bit by honoring this federal holiday. (Okay, so that’s not exactly a “bit.” Get inspired to do something actually meaningful here.) We’ll be back with our regularly scheduled program tomorrow. Happy Birthday, Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.! (And happy second inauguration, Mr. President!)


Naked News: This Week, Sex Is Effed Up

January 18, 2013


A new book called Hard to Get says young independent successful women need more guidance about sex than their elders did, thanks to so many conflicting messages. One Jezebel article kinda proves that point by questioning why so many women willingly engage in orgasm-free casual sex.

Jumping on the “sex is ruined” bandwagon is this Atlantic article about online dating being the end of monogamy, since it offers an endless supply of dates and sex. Hogwash, says this response in the same mag: “online dating is, in fact, irresistible.”

What’s really the problem? Porn. (Bet you guessed that was coming, as it were.) One unscientific survey by Cosmo of sex therapists and experts revealed that porn-problems abound: performance anxiety, low self-esteem, body image insecurities, addiction, the list depressingly goes on and on. One study on porn had to be trashed because they couldn’t find any male subjects who’d never seen porn!

On the brighter side, there was this argument this week for how porn can be a catalyst for spiritual growth. Aw. And you can also now pre-order the book, Making Peace with Porn (i.e. if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em). And finally, the founder of Kink.com defended his company on HuffPo (and promoted the James Franco documentary about his biz called “Kink,” premiering at this year’s Sundance Film Festival – see trailer below).

For more on all things kink, buy our new book 150 Shades of Play, our how-to companion piece to the popular Fifty Shades trilogy!