Why Men Ask You About Their Size (& How You Should Answer)

Pete had some interesting (and some potentially controversial) thoughts in response to our post “If He Asks About Size, Can I Tell Him the Truth?“:

When a guy asks this question, there could be a lot of reasons for asking:

1. He might want to compete against other guys (“Am I better than other guys?”)

This is him seeking a straight up ego-booster. Here, he is wanting to feel more manly. If your man is seeking this, you might need to pad the truth a little for him to receive this.

2. He might need validation on his manliness (“Is my size attractive enough for you?”)

This is him seeking comfort for his insecurity. He wants to know if he is desirable. He wants to feel sexy. Here the truth may hurt a little but if you speak the truth with love and address the deeper issue, he’ll feel a lot better. Sizing is not the only thing that can make him sexy. [If you] give him bad news, tell him how he may be able to be sexy for you. This could be how he plays with your body in foreplay, or the way he looks into your eyes, etc.

3. He might want your judgement on its efficacy (“Can my tool satisfy you?”)

This is him wanting to know how to please you. Size is an easy way to verbally summarize his performance to get you there. But we all know that there are so many variables to getting you to climax. It could be the speed, the skin-to-skin contact, the sounds, your mood, how much you trust him, his attention to certain body parts, etc. Here I would still be honest. But again, don’t leave it at a “it’s too small/skinny/etc.” Tell him why it’s important. It could be that you would like the depth of penetration or the stretch that it makes. This gives him more things to go on and helps him understand what you actually like.

Do you agree with Pete’s advice?
How would you improve it?
Let us know in the comments below!


  1. Well you ONLY tell him the truth if it is THE truth….meaning if you love his cock and it gives you great satisfaction then TELL HIM. But if it’s not quite right, or if it’s smaller than other men then you LIE.
    Why you ask? Because most people are not skillful enough with their language to speak the truth and not make the other person feel badly about themselves.

    The mere fact that he’s asking you this question means he’s feeling a bit insecure. You’re walking in a minefield at this moment and you better be very mindful of where you step…in other words you need to be very mindful of what you say and how you say it.

    Now let’s flip this around and make it about a woman asking if you find her tits attractive or if they are big enough to satisfy you? If they aren’t all that attractive or if they are not as big as you would like…do you think there is ANY WAY you could tell her the truth!? No, of course not! And you’d be a total fool to try and think you could in any way shape or form tell her the truth. You simply lie and say they look sexy and you absolutely love the size of them, the feel of them, how great they feel in your hands and in your mouth.

    So ladies….answer him the way you’d want him to answer you. Pretty simple isn’t it! 🙂

    1. Personally, I feel comfortable telling my partner that he isn’t the “biggest” I’ve ever had, but he is truly the best partner I’ve ever had and sex with him does not even compare to my past partners. I personally believe that satisfaction is not necessarily determined by a mans size, and it is important to express that to your partner.

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