Each week, we at EMandLO.com predict the course of your love life for the week with our own version of irreverent horoscopes — ignore our advice at your own peril! (Hyperbole intended for dramatic effect.) This week, it’s one-word advice, because brevity is the soul of wit.
aries (Mar. 21st-Apr. 20th)
Moderate. (Def. #1: To lessen the violence, severity, or extremeness of. NOT Def #2: To preside over.)
taurus (Apr. 21st-May 20th)
Investigate.
gemini (May 21st-June 21st)
Enjoy!
cancer (June 22nd-July 22nd)
Socialize.
leo (July 23rd-Aug. 22nd)
Submit.
virgo (Aug. 23rd-Sept. 22nd)
Wait.
libra (Sept. 23rd-Oct. 23rd)
Forgive.
scorpio (Oct. 24th-Nov. 22nd)
Converse.
sagittarius (Nov. 23rd-Dec. 21st)
Radiate.
capricorn (Dec. 22nd-Jan. 20th)
Testify.
aquarius (Jan. 21st-Feb. 18th)
Dominate.
pisces (Feb. 19th-Mar. 20th)
Discern.
MORE LIKE THIS FROM EMandLO.com:
- Which Disney Princess Are You? Find Out the REAL Answer
- What Your Sex Toy Says About You
- Anti-Advice: The Top 5 Tricks to Snag a Man
