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Dear Em & Lo,
So I met this guy clubbing and we ended up at a motel and got it on. I was expecting a one-night stand, but he asked if I wanted breakfast and the conversation was great and it lead to a next date with no sex.
For a few weeks he called and texted and we were sort of dating, though we never defined anything (on my birthday, he came with a present and a card). Then about a month after that, I realized he was losing interest. I was into him, so had “the talk,” and I decided to call it off — he seemed to understand, but no objection.
Then about 2 months after that, I called him and we met for drinks and it turned into a booty call. I felt a bit sad as I still had feelings, but he didn’t seem to. A month later, I drunk-dialed and we met and just did our thing. Then again last week. I now know why I am meeting up with him — it’s no longer for a relationship, I think it is because I like to be intimate with HIM and am currently not seeing anyone.
I wanna keep it less frequent but have ground rules, like, only when we are single and such. Also, all the booty calls were made by me and he would come to me. I sort of like it that way, as it is upon my convenience, but also wonder why he would not? I’m also scared that if I even bring up any kind of talk to define anything, he will will just vanish.
Some friends say to stay away as he doesnt seem to value anything. I dunno what to do… just forget it until I am in the mood again… is he not even f-buddy material?
— (A Different Kind Of) Rules Girl
What should Rules Girl do? Leave advice for her in the comments section below.
