THIS CONTEST IS CLOSED: SEE WHO WON HERE!
We’re giving you the chance to win a great, romantic, sensual gift set worth almost $200 from LELO.com for Valentine’s Day!
LELO just launched Tux, a sophisticated, elegant, and luxurious…wait for it…willy warmer! (Only LELO could combine humor and refinement so effectively.) In honor of the occasion, we’d like you to come up with a haiku about penile apparel that takes its cue from LELO by being incredibly clever, never crass. Here are the rules:
- The focus of your haiku should be directly or tangentially related to the subject of willy warmers, or at the very least the warming of willies.
- The haiku should follow the traditional 5/7/5 syllable form.
- Your poem(s) must be original work written by you.
- Submit your haiku(s) either in the comments section below or via this contact form, making sure to include a name or nickname you’d like as the byline of your haiku, as well as a correct email address so that we may reach you privately in case you win.
- Entry deadline is 11:59pm EST Friday, February 5th.
- Must be 18 or older to enter.
- Read the fine print.*
The top five best haikus, as determined by yours truly, will receive their very own lux TUX, with the absolute best haiku also receiving LELO’s Dare Me Pleasure Set, which includes a soft-tasseled Sensua Suede Whip, Etherea Silk Cuffs, and Luna Beads Noir — a prize package worth over $170! (Please note, while you may enter as many haikus as you’d like, you cannot “place” more than once — even if your haikus kick-ass. Let’s share the wealth, shall we?)
The 5 winners, along with any honorable mentions, will be announced via an EMandLO.com post on Monday, February 8th. Any winner who does not respond to Em & Lo’s request for a valid shipping address by Valentine’s Day, January 14th, 2016, will forfeit their prize and a new prize recipient will be selected.
* By entering the contest, you affirm both that you are 18 or older and your work is original, and you agree both to receive occasional newsletters from LELO.com and EMandLO.com and to allow EMandLO.com to republish your haiku(s) in subsequent posts on this website, on their social media channels and in any future Em & Lo media projects in perpetuity. Though every effort will be made, winner gifts are not guaranteed to arrive by Valentine’s Day.
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Want some haiku inspiration?
The Winners of Our Self-Love Haiku Contest
Small or big sized dicks,
Will all fit inside this tux,
Warm it up in style.
Any mans penis,
Wearing this Willy warmer,
Will Look fucking hot.
Cold and frosty days,
Slide on your new tuxedo,
It Warms your man meat.
A shrivelled cold cock,
Grows into a long thick dick,
Inside a warm tux.
Once upon a time,
There was a chilly Willy,
A tux warms it up.
High in the mountains
I though Mexico was warm
Shorts were a poor choice.
Mine’s wearing a tux
Hers is in granny panties
Seems I’m over-dressed.
from a distant shore
a new sky calls leaves to dance;
my dick needs a shirt
On a winter morn
A dick wakes up in it’s tux
What happened last night!?
Soft comfortable,
Covers a mans penis shaft,
Keeps your Willy warm.
Lelo tuxedo,
Mens intimate apparel,
A Willy warmer.
Wearing my warmer,
It looks like a tuxedo,
Feels sexy to me.
Slide on my warmer,
It covers my whole todger,
Except for my knob.
Wrap your willy in
in my moist pink box and feel
the heat of pure Joy!
May your cold hands warm
When holding my manhood wrapped
In merino wool.