The Latest
Toys
The 12 Moves of Christmas

Deck your halls! Jingle your bells! Spin your dreidel! Stuff your stocking! The holiday-themed euphemisms can go on for days – 12 days to be exact. Far from letting the holidays stress us out, let this festive time of year color every part of our lives, even the bedroom, where you and a chosen partner can […]

Dear Em & Lo
Dear Em & Lo: I’m Put Out About His Porn

There is a long-standing debate over whether porn is good for you or bad for you. We received two questions from straight women decidedly in the “bad for you” camp. So we “remixed” our Wise Guys’ thoughts on the topic with some of our own to come up with advice for straight women disturbed by […]

Dear Em & Lo
Can I Lead a Full Life Without Sex?

Dear Em & Lo, I’m 34 and I’ve never had a boyfriend. I was molested as a child and raped as an adult. I’ve never had consensual sex. Yet I have intensely sexual dreams. I’ve had years of counseling, but the fear of having a sexual relationship remains. I isolate myself from men.  The only […]

How To
What’s It Like to Use a Prostate Massager?

The following is an anonymous account of the experiences of trying LELO’s LOKI prostate massager for the first time. At this point of my life and my experience with anal pleasure – my tush tenure, if you will – I feel that I’ve graduated to more robust pleasure products when it comes to plugging and pegging. I considered the […]

Sexual Health
Happy Intersex Awareness Day!

One of my kids has red hair. So when I discovered the upper estimate of the population born with intersex traits is 1.7% — similar to the number of red-haired people in the world — it really hit home how common intersexuality is. You certainly know — or at the very least have met — […]

Advice
5 Argument Tactics That Never Work

Did you ever see the movie Revolutionary Road? It’s a PSA on how NOT to fight as a couple. For those of you who’d rather not submit to two hours of cinematic depression, here are the five hateful argument tactics you should avoid for the sake of love: 1. Fighting Dirty Avoid the temptation to say […]

What's Up Doc?
Dr. Kate: Is Breast Self-Exam Best?

Many of my patients come in for their yearly check-ups, and as I do their breast exam, they confess that they haven’t been checking themselves as regularly as they ought to. But there isn’t really a clear answer as to whether or not women “should” perform breast self-exam (or BSE) on a regular basis. There […]

Do It Tonight
Hot Tip: Be Submissive…On Purpose

If you want a little freedom from all your daily responsibilities, if you’re sick of having to make decisions, if you kinda like being held down and tickled….then why not spend an evening being submissive for a change? Let your partner call all the shots. By being (temporarily) submissive in the bedroom, you can get […]

News
Kavanaugh Is a Teachable Moment

These days, you hear a lot of parents bemoan the fact that they can’t have the news on, for fear their kids might hear something sexually inappropriate. That “America’s Dad” Bill Cosby drugged and sexually assaulted 60 women. That the Catholic Church has been a child-rape factory and cover-up machine for decades.  That our own […]

What's Up Doc?
Terrified of Going to the Gyno? 4 Tips from a Real Doctor (Part 2 of 2)

As two women who’ve had some experience on the receiving end of a speculum, we offered some advice to one reader about how to get over her fear of visiting a gynecologist. Below, actual-gynecologist Dr. Kate tries to further allay her fears as a woman who’s spent her career on the giving end. You’re not […]

Dear Em & Lo
Terrified of Going to the Gyno? 8 Ways to Relax Enough to Make Your Appointment

Hey Em and Lo, I know how important it is to see a gyno, but honestly, I am terrified to go.  I’ve actually made several appointments since I lost my virginity about nine months ago, but every time the date approaches, I find myself canceling last minute.  I’ve tried positive thinking, ignoring thoughts of the […]

Do It Tonight
Hot Tip: Add Some Lube to Your Lovin’

Lube gets a bad rap, so we’d like to clear its name here once and for all: Store-bought personal lubricant is not a “crutch.” And reaching for the wet stuff doesn’t automatically mean you’re “not into it,” “frigid” or “kinky.” For some women, natural lubrication doesn’t necessarily go hand-in-hand with sexual desire (wanting sex) or […]

Dream Interpretation
I Dreamt My Boyfriend’s Pregnant Ex Locked Me Out of My Own House!

Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex & relationships. If you’ve got a good one, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg just might tell you what it means! Click here to submit yours (18 and older only for dream interpretations, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri about dreaming of a friend-with-benefits saying “I love you” in her dreams.” Why […]

Dear Em & Lo
Should I Be Concerned About My Rape Fantasies?

Dear Em & Lo, I’m writing to ask you about your opinion of rape fantasies. I’ve been in a serious and loving relationship with my boyfriend for almost four years now. It’s a very egalitarian, loving, supportive and comfortable relationship. Yet both my boyfriend and I immensely enjoy acting out rape fantasies. We enjoy having […]