Lucky! Time Magazine recently ran an article entitled “My Brother’s Pregnancy and the Making of a New American Family” by Jessi Hempel about a transgender man getting pregnant, having a baby and nursing his child (which introduced us to our new favorite term, “chest-feeding”): Pregnancies like Evan’s—and the many that are likely to follow—will stretch our cultural perceptions […]
Porn is a tricky thing. On the one hand, you can’t legislate people’s fantasies, especially when pornography may be the one sexual outlet they have. As sexual liberator, educator or tension reliever, it can be a positive thing. But, it can also be a destructive thing: ruining relationships, setting up unrealistic expectations, perpetuating misogyny. Certainly some porn […]
Is it the 21st century? Is a woman about to become President of the United States? Do all the best crime dramas feature women in the lead roles (Marcella, Happy Valley, The Fall, The [Swedish] Bridge, The Bletchley Circle…the list goes on)? Yes, women still don’t make the same as men yet — yet — but we’ve come […]
by By Carla McKirdy for Bust Magazine If you’ve ever wondered what life in America would be like if the laws protecting a woman’s right to choose were reversed, look no further than Argentina. Underground abortion clinics whose addresses are revealed only in hushed tones via word of mouth. The paralyzing fear of undergoing what […]
[Editors note: FYI, we at EMandLO.com prefer the term “ravishment fantasy” to further distinguish it from actual rape, since the difference has everything to do with the control Dr. Ley describes below. However, since this is a syndicated column, we’ll keep the original language in tact.] by Dr. David Ley for YourTango One of the hardest presentations I’ve ever given […]
As usual, Johnny had something thoughtful to say. This past week it was about rape culture, thanks to the Stanford rape case in the news: You know… as a straight man you think “rape culture” is bullshit when you learn about it. You believe that a tiny percentage of men are rapists, and since they’re sociopaths, there’s no […]
Reader “Don” had this to say in response to our post “How Many Partners Officially Makes You a Slut?” While we can see the benefits of reclaiming the word and wearing it as a badge of honor, we also appreciate, like Don, the importance of not using it any self-denigrating way, however subtly: Once, a close friend described […]
Dear Em & Lo, I am 18 and newly single, having just broken up with my boyfriend of over a year and my first sexual partner. I am worried about becoming promiscuous just as much as I am worried about denying myself, due to my old fashioned upbringing. I have been reading your site since before […]
Sometimes a reader comment demands more than just a “thumbs down” or a two-sentence rebuttal. Sometimes it warrants its own full-length post. J Male’s recent response to “Why Women Have Ravishment and Rape Fantasies” was one such comment. Our reply is below his: “Rape fantasies were a way [for women] to avoid taking blame for their […]
The start of the 4,532nd season of The Bachelor means my wife has reinstated her ongoing Bachelor viewing parties with some of her female friends. Rather than rolling my eyes and hiding out in my non-existent mancave, I crack a beer and settle in next to her on our couch…because I love my wife, because […]
Reader Lily had a lot to say this week in response to our (oldie but goodie) post “Confession: I Want to Do My Boyfriend with a Strap-On.” We’ve gathered her various comments into one post here for your edification. Preach it, Lily! And we would just add that misperception doesn’t make something so; if we […]
Why are women competitive with each other? Evolutionary psychology says that it’s to protect their wombs from physical harm, while feminist psychology claims it’s because they’ve internalized the patriarchy. A writer in the Times this past weekend posited a different explanation: “We aren’t competing with other women, ultimately, but with ourselves — with how we […]
In honor of the 10th anniversary of her Twilight series, Stephenie Meyers has just released a new edition, which includes a 400+ paged reimagining of the first novel with the genders reversed called Life and Death. The purpose of the new version is to prove to the world that Bella’s character wasn’t an anti-feminist damsel-in-distress, as […]
Much has been written lately about women’s speech patterns, and whether certain verbal behaviors like uptalk (a.k.a. valleyspeak), vocal fry (a.k.a. creak), and “sexy baby voice” are hurting their careers and preventing people from taking them seriously. According to Lake Bell, a woman who talks this way sounds like “a 12-year-old little girl that is submissive […]
“Don’t cry.” “Be a man.” “Man up.” “Don’t be a pussy.” “Grow some fucking balls.” These are the lessons we’re teaching our boys, and it’s hurting everyone. When we feminize caring, empathy and emotional communication and expression, we don’t give boys the capacity to be fully formed human beings. The result is violence and suicide. This […]
View this image | gettyimages.com When I got married, my groom and I wore matching white suits and ties (including inscribed white Converse high tops). Our parents walked each of us down the outside aisles simultaneously until we all met in the middle at the altar. My friend who married us concluded the ceremony with […]