5/2/12
Your Call: I Can’t Have Intercourse, Should I Let Him Sleep Around?

photo via flickr

We get a lot of advice questions coming in at EMandLO.com, but sadly, we just can’t answer them all. Which is why, once a week, we turn to you to decide how best to advise a reader. Make your call by leaving your advice in the comments section below. 

Dear Em & Lo,

My husband and I married when we were 17. On our two-year anniversary, we separated for over six years (we’re back together now). The reason? I can’t have vaginal sex. My OB-GYN says that I have a very rare condition where my cells didn’t form a complete vaginal passage and because of that, my vagina is too short and my pelvic bones grew into the wrong place. She says that is why I feel extreme pain during attempted vaginal intercourse (he’s hitting the bone). There is corrective surgery available but my insurance is saying, “No, it’s not necessary for life.”

This has made my husband very angry and one day he blew up at me saying that he missed having vaginal sex (he was sexually active with other girls while we were separated). He and I have oral sex and anal sex, so we are having sex. Needless to say, his comment hurt me a lot. With the way things are going, I may never be able to have vaginal sex. Should I offer to let him sleep with other women so he can get some vaginal sex? Or am I asking for more problems than I’m trying to fix?

— Two Out of Three