How To
5 Super Nice Ways to Say “You’re Not Good in Bed”

Sex is so easy, even chickens with pea-sized brains can do it. (Speaking of: If you’re looking for a hilarious and enlightening post about how, exactly, chickens do it, go here. You’re welcome. Em has a coop in her backyard with eleven hens and one very lucky rooster, and even she learned something.) But if sex is […]

How To
When Anger Is Helpful in a Relationship…And When It’s Not

Count to ten before you speak, we’re often told, especially when fighting with a partner. Take a deep breath and remember you’re talking to someone you love, the advice goes. Being angry means you’ve lost control, the theory goes. But is there ever a time when you shouldn’t count to ten — when a little anger […]

Say Amything
Dueling Motherhoods: When Lesbians Have a Baby Together (& Then Breakup)

The following is the 4th installment of a hilarious ongoing series by author and squirrel hunter (seriously) Amy Bronwen Zemser called “How to Thaw Your Unborn Child,” about sperm donation and artificial insemination when you’ve got an acute case of lesbianism. Below, she writes about losing her first baby to its biological mother, Amy’s (ex)partner.  Or you can start at the beginning here. I loved that […]

How To
How to Combat the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse… in Bed

You’ve probably heard of “The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse” — these are the four types of behavior that, when they occur on a regular basis in a relationship, are a good predictor of divorce, according to psychology professor and bestselling author John Gottman, Ph.D. According to the Gottman Relationship Blog, “The Four Horsemen typically […]

How To
5 Ways to Show Your Appreciation to Your Partner

Last week we published an article by YourTango explaining how to resuscitate your relationship after a bout of infidelity. The solution? You have to truly — and verbally — appreciate your partner. Like, a lot. But why wait for an affair to do this? In fact, appreciating your partner on a daily basis is a […]

How To
How to Choose a Spouse Based on Your Myers-Briggs Personality Type

by Christine Schoenwald for YourTango Could your perfect guy already be in your life?  Do you know what Myers-Briggs personality type you are? You could be a ENFJ or a ISTJ — and if you do know what you are, do you know which type is best for you? The test, known as the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, categorizes people into […]

Pop Culture
Top 5 Love Lessons from “The Bachelorette” (Kaitlyn’s Finale)

We always get a little case of the post-Bachelor/ette blues when a season comes to an end. Over the course of 3 months, we’ve learned so much about love and lust, what to do, what not to do, who to do, who not to do… At least we have less than a week until “Bachelor […]

Your Call
I Love My Fiance and Still Think He’s Hot. So Where Did My Libido Go?

We get a lot of advice questions coming in at, but sadly, we just can’t answer them all. Which is why, once a week, we turn to you to decide how best to advise a reader. Make your call by leaving your advice in the comments section below.  Dear Em & Lo, I am a 23 year old woman and […]

How We (Finally!) Got to Marriage Equality

by Nathaniel Frank for Slate When I was in college and first realized I might be gay, I was terrified. I pictured living in a remote cabin with a dog, the better to avoid the rejection of a society where I didn’t feel I could ever belong. My shame—my wish to flee instead of to […]

How To
10 Things to Say to Your Partner Instead of “I Love You”

Saying “I love you” can become a form of punctuation in a long-term relationship. People say it at the end of a phone call, or on their way out the door, or as they’re falling asleep at night. And there’s nothing wrong with this. Expressing love often is a good thing! And it’s a nice way to check […]