Virginity
Dear Em & Lo
Dear Em & Lo: How Do I Deflower a Nice Young Man?

Hey Em & Lo! I’m in a tricky situation and don’t know where to look.  I’ve been dating this guy for about a month and found out that he’s a virgin. I’m not. By far. I’m looking for tips and tricks on how to train him and introduce him to this in a good way […]

Sex Poetry
Poet John Donne’s Hard Sell of Sex

Update the language, and John Donne’s “To His Mistress Going to Bed” could be an R&B sex song on the radio today. All about trying to get his lady buck nekkid, this late 16th/early 17th-century British elegy employs hilarious metaphors and euphemisms for body parts and bodily functions (e.g. his soldier is tired of standing, […]

Your Call
Should She Lose Her Virginity to a Married Man?

We get a lot of advice questions coming in at EMandLO.com, but sadly, we just can’t answer them all. Which is why, once a week, we turn to you to decide how best to advise a reader. Make your call on the letter below by leaving your advice in the comments section.  I am a 26-year old black female who […]

How To
How to Cash in Her V-Card

You’re a straight guy who’s had intercourse. You’re dating a woman who hasn’t. But it’s looking like you’ll be her first. Here’s how to do it right in 19 key steps: Engage in lots of foreplay. This is not the time for 2 minutes of kissing followed by 1 minute of boob grabbing before you get […]

How To
10 Considerations for Adult Virgins Who Date

We often get advice questions from virgins (usually straight and female) asking how long they can make a guy wait, if it’s realistic to hold out for the right person, and whether or not there are straight non-virgin guys out there who are willing to wait. To them, we offer these 10 inquisitive ruminations on virginity […]

Vids
New Web Series: “Swipe Click Bang”

The new web series from director Michael Sasso called “Swipe Click Bang” is about the mating habits of Millennials in the age of Tinder. Each webisode focuses on one couple who’ve just met through a hookup app and are either about to do it, are doing it, and/or just did it. According to Sasso, the […]

Dream Interpretation
Dream Interpretation: I’m Christian and Chaste But Masturbate in My Dreams

photo via WeHeartIt Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it (18 and older only, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri: I’ve been having the same recurring […]

Pop Culture
Film: How to Lose Your Virginity

“How To Lose Your Virginity” Trailer from Trixie Films on Vimeo. Two years ago, we asked you to give some Kickstarter lovin’ to the fledgling documentary, “How to Lose Your Virginity”, being made by Theresa Shecter and the gals at Trixie Films. You must have come through, because it’s now a full-length doc, all growed up! The […]

Dear Em & Lo
Can I Have an Orgasm in My Sleep (If I Haven’t Had One Awake)?

Dear Em & Lo, It’s recently come to my attention that women can have orgasms while asleep, similarly to how men can have wet dreams. I was wondering: is it possible to have them before you’ve had an orgasm? As a 19-year old, I sometimes get turned on, but don’t do anything about it for fear of […]

Pop Culture
Losing It: True Tales of Lost Virginity

In Kate Monro’s new book, “Losing It: How We Popped Our Cherry Over the Past 80 Years,” she picks up where Nancy Friday left off, letting a wide range of people tell their stories of how they lost their virginity, smartly bookending each with historical and cultural context. It’s a fascinating book that shows, to […]

Pop Culture
Losing It: How We Popped Our Cherry Over the Last 80 Years

Author Kate Monro has managed to make us jealous of her job: searching the world for first-time tales that don’t often get told. In her new book, “Losing It: How We Popped Our Cherry Over the Past 80 Years,” she picks up where Nancy Friday left off, letting a wide range of people — from a 90-year-old […]

Confessions
Comment of the Week: Give Virgins a Break!

Reader Jane said the following in response to our post, “Your Call: What’s the Best Way to Tell a Guy I’m a Virgin?” If a girl is a virgin at a certain age, 20, 25, 30 etc… and she is with a guy, in a new relationship, and WANTS to have sex with him… why […]

Dear Em & Lo
Dear Em & Lo: How Do I Tell a Guy How Inexperienced I Am?

photo by Balakov Hey Em & Lo, I’m currently 26 and, yep, a virgin. I haven’t been “saving myself” and have no reason for this phenomenon other than I’ve never had the opportunity! (I had low self-esteem in high school, I was involved with theatre in college and all my crushes were gay in college, […]

Confessions
Comment of the Week (OR EMandLO.com Has the Smartest Readers!)

We feel honored, lucky and humble that some very smart readers and writers choose EMandLO.com as their place to intelligently discuss and debate issues of sexuality and culture. Exhibit A: The comments section of last week’s Comment of the Week, which was a response to the post “Your Call – How Long Can a Virgin Make […]

Dear Em & Lo
Dear Em & Lo: I’m a Man, Should I Shave Down There?

photo via flickr Get Personal Advice Publicly on EMandLO.comTry Our New *PRIVATE* Advice Service! Dear Em & Lo, I came across your site as I am trying to prepare for  my wedding night and my first time with my wife. I know nowadays it’s normal for women to shave/wax around the vagina to look clean, […]

Confessions
Comment of the Week: Just Say No to Arbitrary Time Limits on Sex!

photo via flickr For the record, when we pick a “Comment of the Week,” it’s not necessarily an indication that we agree with the poster. We’re not that narrow-minded, we swear! Sometimes we pick comments that make an interesting point, or comments we think will start an interesting debate, or comments that present an argument […]