Our contributor, a woman who wishes to remain anonymous, has a confession to make.
My boyfriend’s butt is beautiful. It’s pretty. It’s plump. It fits in the palm of my hand. I can’t keep my hands off it, and simply touching it turns me on. I’ve spanked it, kissed it, rubbed it, grabbed it, bit it — and now I want to stick something in it. A strap-on dildo to be exact. I want to bend that boy over, face down, bum up, and do him in the most dirty of ways. I want to make his prostate gland giddy with anal afternoon delight.
So last November I said to him, “I want to do you in the butt with a strap-on. I think it’s only fair.” He’s not only put his peen in my vajayjay, he’s poked me in the tush too.
“Um, no.” He laughed nervously and changed the subject. Needless to say, this no-bullshit approach did not work.
Unwavering in my attempt to stick my strap-on dildo where the sun don’t shine, I approached him again in December with a more sensitive strategy: “Just because I want to pack your fudge and you let me doesn’t mean you are a fudge packer, baby.” I thought assuring him I wouldn’t think he was gay, but rather a try-anything-sexual would work for sure. Sadly, this simply wasn’t the case.
“I know,” he replied, “I just don’t want a dick in my butt. It’s not going to feel good.”
With this important information, I devised a more detailed put-it-in-the-pooper plan. In January, sounding oh so scientific (and as cute as can be), I spouted off some knowledge gleaned from this very site:
“The prostate gland is similar in size and shape to a walnut. It is located at the base of the bladder and surrounds the ejaculatory ducts and urethra. It is essentially the equivalent of the female G-spot, hence it’s called the P-spot. When stimulated during anal sex, it can produce orgasms. The P-spot is your best friend and you’re ignoring him. That’s not very nice, now is it? From what I hear he is very fun to hang out with. Perhaps you should make a play date.”
Silence…more silence…then finally, what my pretty little ears have always wanted to hear. “Maybe…”
After a month of many talks about how to travel the brown brick road, we agreed that purchasing a vibrating anal plug would be the best way to get things started. February arrived and with it a text message from my boyfriend that read, “I’m really excited for you to do me in the butt. Wanna buy a butt plug today?” Hell yes I do. Butt plug today, strap-on tomorrow!
Last week we went to Fascinations, a local sex shop, and purchased our very first 4-inch blue butt plug. We rushed home, stripped off our clothes and jumped into bed. He looked a bit uneasy.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” I asked him. “I only want to do this if you’re comfortable with it.”
“It’s probably going to feel like a turd,” he laughed. Not the response I was hoping for, but he bent over, face down, bum up, just as I’d imagined, and after applying a little lube I eased that blue puppy in.
I started slow and soft, in and out, in and out, then applied a bit more pressure. After a few minutes I turned on the vibrator located inside the butt plug. It was loud. Very loud. The longer I sat there on my knees behind him, the more I felt like I should be wearing latex gloves and a lab coat; perhaps throw in a clipboard and stethoscope as well. Probing is the word that came to mind. It felt far too formal for my liking, and I could tell by his silence and his face in the mirror behind our bed that he was not enjoying the ride.
“Okay,” I said. “Let’s try a different approach.” We sat for a few minutes and discussed what would feel good. We agreed that foreplay first without the butt plug was a good idea.
Some plug-free fondling led to some plug-free fellatio. And when he was good and ready, I popped the plug back in. He liked this combination of front and back attention much better, as did I. But after a while my mouth and hands needed a break, so we resumed the prostate exploration in the spooning position. I inserted the butt plug half-way in and angled it up towards his belly button to start. “That feels really good. It’s vibrating my balls.” Then I pushed the plug all the way in and started feeling around left to right. “That doesn’t feel so good,” he said. So I started making soft, slow circles inside. He liked that a lot.
After about an hour our anal endeavor was over and the search for his prostate gland was called off. He didn’t orgasm and he was strangely quiet as we lay there. It occurred to me that maybe I was asking too much. Maybe expecting amazing orgasms from just the push of a button was unrealistic. Maybe we should have thought of the plug as a side dish rather than the main course. Maybe P-spot stimulation just doesn’t work for some guys, just like some ladies hate having their G-spot touched…
Then he turned to me, smiling, and said, “Practice makes perfect, baby. I’m ready for round two. What about you?”
Like I said, butt plug today, strap-on tomorrow.
Tony H is right.
Wanting to have mind-blowing orgasms is not gay. Prostate stimulation will produce that for you.
It took me awhile to start being able to have a good orgasm with toys, because I was uncomfortable taking things back there. After trial and error though, I eventually figured out how to help get myself off.
The last girl I dated was the first one that I was ever comfortable with playing with my ass. But when she first started, OH. MY. GOD. Just a few fingers and a hand-job, and I was climbing up the walls. I came so hard that I was almost yelling. After that, we tried dildos, and eventually a strapon. The best part is that after I cum, I am still rock-hard and I can turn around and have sex with her. She got really turned on by the domination part, as did I, especially when we immediately flipped roles.
Just keep an open mind and a light heart about it all. Be patient and explore, because for me, it didn’t happen right away. Once you know what an orgasm feels like WITH prostate stimulation, you will wonder why you hadn’t tried it sooner.
I have been reading the posts here and the women who have men who are sexually adventurous, you are blessed indeed. To me, the beauty of a committed relationship is that with your partner, there is freedom to do whatever is comfortable for both of you.
I never hear anyone say that if a woman receives cunnilingus, she is a closet lesbian. Then again, the stigma for being a lesbian is less than the stigma for being homosexual. What goes on between two consenting adults is between them. If they like it, I love it for them. If a man wants to experiment with anal stimulation, that does not make him gay. Some women worry that “playing with their man’s backdoor” will create a bisexual being or awaken desires that they can’t deal with or actively support. The thing that people fail to realize is that anything outside of a committed relationship is cheating. It doesn’t matter what sex it is with. Cheating is cheating. If a man loves you and respects you and the relationship and the life that you share, he will communicate his feelings with you. I feel that a committed relationship is where both people should be able to express who they are and what they want. Anything less and you are cheating yourself.
I had 2 boyfriends who let me play around with the backdoor, to different degrees. I felt honored that we were able to share something special. Some women are not opened minded enough to understand that sex is for the two people in the relationship. Fantasies are not just for one person; they are for both. Sometimes we need to indulge each other’s fantasies. It is a beautiful thing to have someone to share your fantasies with; someone who loves you and doesn’t judge you.
I feel that if a person is really uncomfortable doing something, their partner has no right to bully them into doing what is uncomfortable. However, sometimes we need to compromise and venture out a little bit; try different things. Oftentimes we want our mate to do things but when the shoe is on the other foot, we balk.
I am very happy for the women who have men who are open and open minded; I am also happy for the men who have women who indulge their desires.
I, like a fool brought the damn thing and we even laugh at it . Oooh ,but one night, we sucumbed to our wants. didI love it ,yes, will I do it again, yes, just remember lots of lube, we have been married for 11 years , no children, guess why?
Years ago I was fooling around with an older married woman and she kept trying to finger me , i always protested. One day i let her do it and was amazed.Since then i tried toys and fantasized about strapons for years. My last gf and my current gf are totally into it and i get pounded on a regular basis.You cant even explain how unbelievably intense the orgasms are.KEEP ON PEGGING
I can’t wait for my girl to give it to me. I’m 24, she’s 22 and we’re both very sexual. I’ve been playing with my ass for many years but always solo. She has been fiddling with my ass for the past few months and I’ve been eager to please her. Haven’t gotten past her finger yet, but I do have a toy that she knows of and she started sliding it up and down my ass yesterday. I got hard instantly despite the fact I came 5 minutes ago. I even said “I want you to fuck me now” but she didn’t hear it proper and when she asked what I said I just said nothing. Shy. 😉 Anyway, can’t wait for her to peg me so maybe I’ll start the conversation by buying us both plugs for the hollys. And it’s fantastic to read that there are this many women out there that want to do this. Made me stop thinking I’m a nutter. Cheers!
There’s another good educational DVD out there that just came out that is great… check it out here http://www.comeasyouare.com/default/index.cfm/shop/product/Expert-Guide-to-Anal-Pleasure-for-Men-DVD/
I wish my girl was as adventurious as you all I usually get is the old missionary pos. she never wants to try anything thanks for the story and good luck if you can talk him into it he will eventually like it I can personally attest to that. ROK St.Louis
my boyfriend and i are going to try using a strapon for the 1st time. we both really love this idea. i would just like to tell people that if your not completly sure about doing this with your partner i would say just talk about it more, the more you talk about it the more it will seem normal and you will be more open to the idea. and you should be happy that your partner is open with you about what they like. you should respect that and try to understand why they like it. because it doesn`t mean your boyfriend is gay or that your girlfriend wants to be a man. it just means they like strappons and they want you to try it with them. i tell everyone thats trying something new in bed to all ways try it three times… if the 1st time suck wait a week and try again it will most likely keep getting better the more times you try it. 🙂 wish you the best of luck and hope i helped some one out.
My husband was a little shy about the idea at first but with the aid of a bottle of white wine and a cheap pair of handcuffs
he soon got into it and even asks for it from time to time. I alternate between blindfolding him and forcing him to look me
in the eyes while thrusting, such a turn on for me! If you want your marriage to work you both have to give and take – so to
speak!
Sorry Johnboy, you just dont get it. My husband takes it regularly off me and its the domination that turns it on. I have large titties and he finds having them dangle over his face while banging his bottom at the same time orgasmic. Boy-on-Boy does not have the same effect!
anal is for woman not men, if u like it in the ass then your no better then gay men, no matter if it aint a mans cock theres no difference so if you say u like anal then you need to come out of the closet cause your homosexual..
henry Says:
June 12th, 2010 at 2:45 pm
My wife and I did it last night. I’m no virgin. Married 11 years we’ve done this on and off since we got married. We just haven’t done this in maybe a year.
I wanted to throw a question out there to the ladies… and the men that have been pegged.
Afterwards, after I’d had a huge orgasm from her massive toy, I felt “owned.” I felt that I was definitely a possession of my wife’s. >>> I’m not saying subservient or submissive, just an incredible loyalty.<<< I was her boy. My trust level in her and love for her was off the charts.
Here's my question, from the orgasm, or the penetration?
——
It is both but mostly the penetration.
My girlfriend of 2 years and I have been exploring ass play for several months, starting with her sticking a finger in there during blowjobs and massaging my prostate. Things escalated recently when discussing our fantasies and I mentioned her doing me with a strapon. She was completely into it. We haven’t bought one yet, but she does occasionally tie me up, blindfold me, and put different objects in my ass. It all feels great and is extremely erotic for both of us. Can’t wait until we buy a strapon and she bends me over and gives it to me!
wOW. Ur a lucky girl… just few minutes before I found this article I texted my bf “Im gonna buy a dildo (strap on more specifically) for you”.
Hes muslim and very veryyyyyyyy strict about those things.
Ive been fighting for 2 years now and couldnt get him to please me with that.
He got loads of personality traits that tells me hes bisexual but due to religious matters doesnt want to accept it.
He’s fairly attracted to guys but he doesnt realise. Instead of spooning me he prefers to be spooned. I got my own dildo which I use for myself and lately he’d been curious but keep saying “bad things about the dildo” and how sinful that is.
He finally touched it on me. And uneasy I dare to tell him that I wanna use it on me but with him lyin down, quietly. I promised him I wont ask him to like it either to speak if he doesnt want. Just to let me do it. Speechless after all he finally lied down and closed his eyes. Just before I got my orgasm he started to move his bump and nearly got his orgasm in the bed.
I thanked him and had been now 3 times we’ve tried but I wanna go further.
Surprinsingly, he just TEXT ME BACK: “OK”
Let’s see how he likes the fact that it wont be a small dildo like mine but a strap on. 😀
JW (and all the ladies out there), I think you should keep exploring with you boyfriend. I’m sure, when you find the right stop, he will love it. My girlfriend has stimulated my prostate a few times; and every time I came uncontrollably (wasn’t even touch myself)… it’s a strange, yet very pleasurable sensation.