Dream Interpretation: My Husband Went Down On Another Woman

Showtime’s The Affair

Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it (18 and older only, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri:

My husband spends a lot of time doing extracurricular activities that he and I used to do together, but now I’m working 12 hour shifts 5 days a week. Recently I’ve started having dreams of him being unfaithful and having oral sex with someone else, where he’s the giver. He tries to kiss me but I can smell it. We’re with a group of people and everyone starts to laugh at me. What does this mean?

Lauri:  If you’ve been reading my column here on EMandLO.com, you are probably aware that the cheating dreams you are getting are caused by your feelings of being “cheated” out of all the fun you and hubby used to have. Rather than the activities being something the two of you share, they now feel like a third wheel. Although, understandably, you must be wondering about the oral sex aspect of the dream.

Typically, anything oral in a dream can be connected to communication. Does he tell you all about the fun he had on those days he goes out and you have to work? If so, THAT is what is causing the jealousy and THAT is why he is the giver of oral in the dream. His trying to kiss you is also about communication. When he sees that you are getting upset about the fun he is telling you about, does he try to sweeten you up and make you not feel so bad? That’s not unlike a verbal kiss… and might even feel like “he’s rubbing your face in it,” so to speak. But you still smell the remnants of the oral in the dream because you can’t let the jealousy go. And I don’t blame you… it stinks! (Get it?)

You must feel like he isn’t being sensitive to the fact that you are feeling left out of all the fun. He probably feels like there is no reason he shouldn’t still be able to do these activities. Relationships require compromise. You aren’t in it for yourself; you’re in it for each other. As long as he keeps up all this fun without you, your dreams are going to continue, because the jealousy and animosity will continue. Hopefully a compromise can be reached. My advice… don’t nag. Don’t be accusatory. Sweeten the pot. Be creative. Good luck!


Visit Lauri’s site, WhatYourDreamMeans.com, for even more dream interpretations! If you want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning, then check out her latest book, Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, which will give you the tools you need to become a dream expert, too. Check out all of Lauri’s books here.