Em & Lo’s Sexy Holiday Gift Guide: $10 Edition

This is the first installment of our five-part series on sexy gift giving. We start here with 12 affordable gifts ALL AROUND 10 BUCKS, then, over the next few posts, we’ll work our way up with gifts priced around $25, $50, $100 and $150+. They’re not all sex toys, so you’re sure to find something for every adult on your shopping list!


1. For the married with children:
“Dept. of Speculation” by Jenny Offill
A suspenseful love story that’s romantic and depressing and funny — they’ll read it in one sitting!


2. For the foodie:
Amco Rub Away Bar
Don’t let them bring their garlic fingers to bed.


3. For the sex toy collector:
LELO Toy Cleaning Spray
Help them keep their toys shiny and new (and 99.9% germ free)!


4 For the tech geek:
Quirky Cordies Desktop Cable Management
There are few things sexier than neatly arranged power cords and charging accessory cables.


5. For the sausage lover:
“Little Book of Big Penis” (Taschen Pocket Series) edited by Dian Hanson
150 massively endowed models from the 1940s through the 90s. Not that size matters.


5. For the butt man or woman:
“Little Book of Butts” edited by Dian Hanson
150-plus pics of female badonkadonk.


7. For the facial hair grower:
Proraso Shaving Soap, Eucalyptus & Menthol, 5.2 oz (150 ml), New Formulation
A smooth face — all the better to kiss you with.


8. For the tensed up:
Ignite Me Massage Candles
Burn the candle, blow out the flame, and drizzle.


9. For the “Fifty Shades” fan:
“150 Shades of Play” by yours truly, Em & Lo
We didn’t write this review, we swear!: “Em & Lo are irreverent, smart and funny feminists out to demystify the world of kink. Best of all, I caught up on all the juicy info and how-tos without enduring the pain of reading a single page of the Fifty Shades trilogy! Smartly written in an A-Z dictionary style with the book’s other terms usefully bolded throughout. Also loved the sometimes hilarious illustrations.”


11. For the traveling business man:
Tenga Egg Masturbation Sleeve
For when you can’t be with the one you love. Peel the outer layer like you would a hard-boiled egg, then crack open the shell to reveal an “ona-cup” — each one offers a unique internal texture. Get different strokes from different yolks!


11. For the health conscious: 
“Crazy Sexy Kitchen: 150 Plant-Empowered Recipes to Ignite a Mouthwatering Revolution” by Kris Carr
150 delicious, nutrient-dense, vegetarian recipes designed to nourish the mind, body, and soul.


12. For the child of the ’80s:
“List of the Lost” by Morrissey
They’ll enjoy mixed metaphors, giggling snowballs, a “bulbous salutation,” and worse, in Morrissey’s first novel, which was nominated for a 2015 Bad Sex Writing Award (hello, White Elephant party).