Why Online Dating Is Much Rougher on Men Than Women

MVP reader Johnny said the following in response to our post, “New App: Online Dating Protection” (he was responding in particular to a concern we voiced that, rather than protect women, this app would just make it harder for jerk guys to disappear):

Ahem. I have to disagree with your math on who’s going to use this app to jerkiest effect.

Most men will strike out most times when it comes to internet dating. Let’s say – since we lack actual figures – that half of the minority of men men who do get laid from internet dates are interested in more. Let’s also give the average guy the benefit of the doubt and assume that half of all disinterested guys will be respectful enough to end things properly.

That’s a fairly small minority of guys using this app to give women the slip.

… whereas every one of those most-of-the-time strike-out dates gives a woman the opportunity to pull the same. Unfortunately flaking has become the modern woman’s de facto mode of rejection these days. And most of the guys who get flaked on won’t be stalkers – they’ll just be regular guys who she doesn’t have the basic courtesy to reject.

Come on. There’s NO WAY churlish players are going to outnumber no-manners women here.

Phrased better: the percentage of internet dates that end in a lay is very low compared to the percentage of internet dates that end in rejection; online dating is a woman’s game, so most of the time a woman is doing the rejecting. Even if churlish vs. honorable personal character is evenly dispersed between genders, women will have far greater opportunity to take the easy-yet-scummy way out of an uncomfortable situation.