Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. This week, a woman asks Lauri:
I keep having these dreams about my fiancé’s brother, and now it’s really starting to scare me. Here’s the basic info of the way he normally is:
A good majority of the time, he is rude, argumentative and sarcastic towards me. We’ve figured out the reason: I’m standing in the way of he and his little brother. They were always together through everything. Then I came in the picture and basically cut him off in his eyes. But recently, he has been very kind and fun to be around, which is a total change for the way he was before.
In my dreams he is very emotional towards me. He snuggles up against me, tries kissing me, caresses me, etc. I tell him that we can’t because of his brother, and he tells me he knows but he still keeps going at it. I try to resist at first, but I eventually give in. In the dreams, he’s kind, gentle and very romantic. Basically, he’s being everything that my fiancé rarely is. In the dreams, I eventually snuggle, sneak kisses, and fall in love with him. All the while thinking about how this is wrong to do to my fiancé.
The dreams are very vivid in my mind and I find it very hard to look at him. What does this mean? I’m finding him very attractive and more interesting than before due to these dreams and am starting to get very worried about this. What is going on?
Is our dreamer with the wrong brother? Find out what Lauri says after the jump…
Lauri: The important thing to remember about most sex dreams is that (sorry to take the fun out of it) they are rarely about sex at all! To the dreaming mind, it’s not about a physical union you want but rather a psychological union you need. It’s actually all about cough — coming together — cough on an emotional or psychological level. And so it seems that you two have, indeed, come to a certain understanding. But alas, sex dreams, when not understood, can certainly cloud our normally reasonable outlook. It seems that the dreams came before the attraction rather than the attraction coming before the dreams, and that right there makes all the difference. Don’t be misguided by these dreams and think that the brother is the better man for you! They are merely a confirmation from your wiser, dreaming self that the needed union has taken place. There’s even an added bonus in that these dreams are alerting you to something that is missing in your relationship with your fiancé, which is why the dreams have come to you more than once. I wouldn’t necessarily tell him about the dreams (who knows what can of worms that might open up!) but I would clue him in that certain needs are not being met. Understanding these dreams and taking care of the issue they are alerting you to will keep them from coming back.
Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it. Anonymity guaranteed!