Advice from three of EMandLO.com’s guy friends. This week they answer the following: “Do men really think about baseball to make sex last longer? If they don’t know anything about baseball, what else do they think about?” To ask the guys your own question, click here.
Straight Single Guy (Tom Miller): I guess I’ve never talked about it with other guys, but I don’t know if delaying strategy is really discussed. I think dudes are generally pretty focused on the task at hand. Sometimes we think of a scene from Spaceballs, and that’s when you catch us laughing.
Straight Married Guy (Figleaf): I never really understood baseball statistics (the canonical thing the old advice manuals recommended men think about) but — true story! — when I was younger, I did sometimes make sex last longer by trying to figure out why anyone would want to think about baseball when they were having sex!
For the record, one of the things that made sex last longer, for me and I think for a lot of men, is to learn to surrender to the feeling instead of resisting it. Sounds paradoxical, but the trick is that stress only makes you think you’re lasting longer. Enjoying yourself and your partner’s enjoyment, realizing there’s no hurry, realizing that if you do ejaculate there are lots of things you and your partner can do till you’re ready again, are all much better things to think about… that have the added benefit of making sex actually last longer.
Gay Married Guy (Joel Derfner, author of Swish): I have trouble believing it’s possible to find a man who tries to make sex last longer.
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Our “wise guys” are a rotating group of contributors, some of whom wish to remain anonymous and some of whom like the attention. Tom Miller writes the Tomfoolery blog for YourTango; this week’s Gay Married Guy is Joel Derfner, author of Swish; and our Straight Married Guy is Figleaf, the guy behind RealAdultSex.com. To ask the guys your own question, click here.