The Wahl 7-in-1
Sometimes called the Wahl 7-in-1 or the Wahl Coil, the Wahl is second only to the Hitachi Magic Wand in the wink-wink, nudge-nudge, “no, really, it’s a ‘back massager” charade. The Wahl is coil operated, which means it’s lighter, faster, and waaaay quieter than the Hitachi. Like the Hitachi, a Wahl can last for years if you treat it right.
Officially, according to Wahl (and if you talk to our lawyer, this is what you heard from us), it’s not supposed to be used on the genitals — it even says so in the manual (at least it did, in the manual we got with ours a few years ago). Unofficially, well, women have been using it on their happy place for years, and responsible stores like GoodVibes.com continue to stock it, so we feel pretty good about turning a blind eye. Carol Queen, Goodvibe’s staff sexologist, told us a while back: “The Wahl Clipper corporation once had a Catholic priest on their board of directors, and the ‘genitals’ language is a sop to him. The company knows damn good and well what we sell these vibrators for, and they seem perfectly happy to continue to supply us.” Then again, Wahl told the ladies at A-Womans-Touch.com that some people have reported injuries after using their massager downtown, so proceed at your own risk.
The Wahl looks kind of like a handheld blender, and comes with a bunch of attachments for “scalp massage,” “deep muscle massage,” “spot application massage,” etc — all for external use only. The spot tool is best suited for external clitoral stimulation, though we’d like to add that the scalp tool gives a damn good scalp massage, too. One downside is that holding the Wahl for an extended period can make your hand go numb; but if it makes other body parts tingly in a good way, maybe you won’t care.
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“I am a man, young, full of testosterone. [I] run, surf, box and practice Tae Kwen Do. I do not accept that explanation about testosterone being culprit for cheating. That is the excuse of the imbecile, the boorish and the mentally retarded.”
— James, commenting on the poll “Would You Cheat…“
Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. This week, we wanted to get our dream analyst’s take on last week’s question to Dr. Kate about wet dreams:
I’ll just cut right to the chase: I have orgasms in my sleep, what can be called “wet dreams.” When I dream something erotic (even if it’s just my husband and I having sex), not only do I become aroused, but I have actual orgasms. I would say I have several wet dreams a month. Now, I’m not complaining — it’s kind of awesome, to be honest! — but I want to know how common this is amongst women? Because I’ve never heard of women having wet dreams. Men, yes…women, no. Although, my own husband hasn’t ever had a wet dream. I find that strange, because I always thought that men are the only ones to have them. So what’s the deal?
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Advice from three of our guy friends. This week a straight woman asks, “What do men in general think about cougars?”
Gay Single Guy (Jay Dyckman):
“I am Cougar, hear me roar,
In years too big to ignore…”
If it isn’t already, this should be the anthem for the beloved cougar. Prowl on, ladies! Honestly, what’s the big deal? OK, so maybe it is a sexual desire fueled largely out of a denial that one is rapidly aging off this mortal coil. We’re all headed there anyway, aren’t we? Why not grab a little nubile ass on the way out? What the cougar phenomenon tells us is that (1) we like coming up with weird monikers for sexually-active women (see MILF); and (2) this country still has a problem with casual sex as it relates to women.
Straight Single Guy (Tyler Barnett): The cougar is a bit of an anomaly to me. On the one hand, cougars have experience, confidence and generally pleasing physical attributes, all of which are very attractive characteristics. On the flip side, they can be difficult to please and tend to try too hard. Personally, I find confidence attractive, but a truly attractive woman doesn’t have to try so hard to be sexy. So cougars aren’t generally my thing. But every now and again I’ll run into that mature woman who looks me in the eyes like she’s ready to pounce…and I hope she does. I think the trick to the sexy cougar is subtlety. If you can pull off a look 20 years below your age without appearing like it took you 20 years in the mirror to accomplish, you have mastered cougar purrfection. Grrr baby, very grrr.
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Dear Em & Lo,
I am in a situation where I can’t let go of my ex boyfriend. We dated for almost a year and in the beginning I felt loved, but as time went on he stopped calling. He wouldn’t answer my calls, didn’t reply to my texts — and that went on for 6 months. I broke up with him and then, three days later, went back to him. Currently I have a boyfriend and when things don’t go well in our relationship I always go to my ex for comfort. As much as I hate to admit it, I still love him and feel like he is the only person who gets me. So I thought maybe we could be friends with benefits, because he’s not a good boyfriend. What should I do?
–Pining
Can’t see the poll? Click here to take it.
Look, we’re all for the occasional casual sex, especially when it’s between two parties who equally understand the casual nature of said fling, who are fully aware of the inherent risks of such behavior, and who treat each other with kindness and respect even though they may never see each other again. But this stupid video from Ben Taylor (spawn of James Taylor and Carly Simon) is a perfect example of what’s wrong with a lot of sex today:
It’s all, “Me, me, me, me. I don’t care about you, what you have to say, or what you think. I just want to get you drunk so I can basically date rape you.” The visuals only compound the offensiveness of the lyrics, further suggesting that it’s all about quantity rather than quality, that (hot) women have nothing to say, that one just blends into the next. What a terrible message about sex…and women! Claiming it’s all a “joke” to begin with doesn’t make it funny. Besides, if you’re going to do the whole face morphing thing, you better make sure it looks at least as technically good as Michael Jackson’s “Black or White” video which was made 18 freaking years ago. And don’t even get us started on that pseudo accent that’s supposed to make you sound cool and sexy but actually just makes you sound like your self-involved celebrity parents dropped you on the head as a baby one too many times. And if you’re uneasy being in front of the camera for this song’s video (as you should be), why are you in front of the camera to introduce it?… Can you tell we’re annoyed?
We guess it was only a matter of time before the true-love-waits crew decided to use sex to sell abstinence. After all, if sex can sell anything — even, ew, toilet paper — why shouldn’t it be used to promote the very absence of sex? That’s so po-mo our heads hurt. But here’s what really makes our heads hurt: It’s the Candie’s Foundation — yes, of Candie’s shoes fame — that wants to sex up the abstinence-only campaign. The t-shirt above is the winner of the Candie’s Foundation’s “New Sexy Slogan” contest. Ah, Candie’s. How fondly we remember you from that ad starring a naked Playboy Bunny on the pot…and the one featuring a teen starlet who looks like she’s posing for doggy-style…not to mention the one with abstinence role model of the year, Britney Spears…and then this ad, which is so f*&%ed up we can only link to it, speechless. (And when we say f*&%ed up, we’re not just talking about Mark McGrath’s highlights.) Yay, girl power in stripper shoes! And did we mention that the new face of the Candie’s Foundation’s abstinence campaign is Bristol Palin? The jokes just write themselves, people.
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Sometimes called the Wahl 7-in-1 or the Wahl Coil, the Wahl is second only to the Hitachi Magic Wand in the wink-wink, nudge-nudge, “no, really, it’s a ‘back massager” charade. The Wahl is coil operated, which means it’s lighter, faster, and waaaay quieter than the Hitachi. Like the Hitachi, a Wahl can last for years if you treat it right.
Officially, according to Wahl (and if you talk to our lawyer, this is what you heard from us), it’s not supposed to be used on the genitals — it even says so in the manual (at least it did, in the manual we got with ours a few years ago). Unofficially, well, women have been using it on their happy place for years, and responsible stores like GoodVibes.com continue to stock it, so we feel pretty good about turning a blind eye. Carol Queen, Goodvibe’s staff sexologist, told us a while back: “The Wahl Clipper corporation once had a Catholic priest on their board of directors, and the ‘genitals’ language is a sop to him. The company knows damn good and well what we sell these vibrators for, and they seem perfectly happy to continue to supply us.” Then again, Wahl told the ladies at A-Womans-Touch.com that some people have reported injuries after using their massager downtown, so proceed at your own risk.
The Wahl looks kind of like a handheld blender, and comes with a bunch of attachments for “scalp massage,” “deep muscle massage,” “spot application massage,” etc — all for external use only. The spot tool is best suited for external clitoral stimulation, though we’d like to add that the scalp tool gives a damn good scalp massage, too. One downside is that holding the Wahl for an extended period can make your hand go numb; but if it makes other body parts tingly in a good way, maybe you won’t care.
Oh, it’s so unfair! We women are held to ridiculous American Apparel size-0 standards (yes, mostly self-imposed, but the media practically makes us do it!), while men get to eat what they want, become chubby, and are still considered cute and even sexy (e.g. Seth Rogen, Zach Galifianakis, Tobey Maguire). To make matters worse, the NYTimes Styles section on Wednesday embraced potbellies on guys in Williamsburg as a hot, new trend — an ironic reaction to metrosexuality and “manscaping.” In other words, beer guts — but only on guys — are now stylish. (Salon’s Broadsheet does a nice job of poo-poo-ing this particular piece of doo-doo.)
Read the rest of this post on SUNfiltered
A weekly roundup of some of our favorite sex- and love-related posts from various blogs and websites:
The brand new Filament magazine in the U.K. calls bullshit on the so-called common knowledge that women don’t like to look. The real problem, they figure, is that women have just never had anything decent to look at. According to their “Female Gaze” mission statement: “From research we’ve learnt that what most women find erotic does not at all match what is typically thought of as an erotic image of a man designed for women. For example, on average, women prefer: men who are not muscle-bound; men with more feminine face shapes; men with attractive faces; images that show the subject’s character and the environment he is in.” Oh yeah, and sometimes women like to see erections, too. And there’s the, er, rub.
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Dear Em & Lo,
My husband and I have been been sexually active with one another for five years. I’ve been smoking cigarettes for four years. I slowed down dramatically when I got pregnant in 2007 (from needing my own pack to two cigarettes a day or none at all). My husband didn’t know about my smoking while pregnant. (My daughter was born very healthy weighing 7lbs and 15oz and measuring 19 1/2 in.) After I gave birth to her I went back to needing my own pack and my diet changed to eating whatever I wanted. That’s when my husband slowed down with oral on me.
I am working on quitting cigarettes and I am proud of myself because I’m doing better than I did when I was prego. I’m watching what I’m eating, too. Now I can’t really remember what I smelled and tasted like when we first started dating. But I know he LOVED going down on me. I don’t smell bad and I don’t taste bad. But he’s not going down on me frequently anymore, so I KNOW my taste and smell is not the same.
I’ve been reading different things on the internet for the past two/three hours and everyone is saying the same thing. “Eat more fruit and vegetables.” I don’t need to be told to stop smoking because this I already know will affect my body in more than many ways. It’s been said to get pineapple juice, cranberry juice, and strawberries in your diet. And vegetables, too. Like asparagus. For one, I don’t know how to eat it. I HAVE tried it once in my cooking class back in high school and I didn’t like it. And I don’t know what other vegetables to eat. We eat baked beans, corn, mashed potatoes, and Caesar salad — I know these are not even really considered veggies.
I am also a little concerned with the decrease in self lube I am producing. Sometimes it’s good and sometimes I need more. We tried lube you buy from the store and we do not like it. I have a really good hunch that this also has something to do with what I’m putting in my body.
In general, I want to get my body to a more healthy state and get better benefits in the bedroom, too. Any advice or facts are greatly appreciated.
Mrs. Potato Head
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Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. This week, a reader asks Lauri:
Last night, I had a dream where I was staying at his house, but in a separate room, and in a part of the house there was a dirty little room where a kind of demon monkey lived, and the monkey had little passages all through the house. Somehow, I killed it because it creeped me out, and I was told after I saw it seven times I would die. (It turned out the monkey came back to life when you kill it.) After I saw it six times, I became scared, and rung up my mother to ask her to come get me, but she ignored me and hung up, so I stopped opening my eyes. When it was time for dinner, I opened my eyes and saw the monkey again, and I broke down crying, then the dream ended. It left me feeling really bothered. What does it mean?
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Our contributor Lisa has a confession to make:
It’s not every day you get to take a new line of lube for a test drive — that’s one of the perks of contributing to EMandLO.com. I had sworn off the stuff for a while after a bad experience with the mint-flavored variety and some anal play (let that be a lesson to you!). But if there’s one thing I’ve learned from this site, it’s to keep an open — and educated — mind when it comes to sex and its accessories. For example, I’ve learned that some super-sensitive vaginas don’t take kindly to lubes containing glycerin (i.e. most flavored lubes), but I knew that wouldn’t be a problem for me, so I accepted my latest mission: to test out five varieties of the Durex Play line (with names that could have been stolen from Hubba Bubba).
Very Cherry: In general, the idea of flavored lube doesn’t thrill me, and this lube confirmed my distaste for the stuff: The texture was fine — smooth, not too thick or sticky — but the flavor was absolutely nauseating. As a child, I had a chronic sore throat for years and the smell alone instantly brought back memories of gagging on cough syrup. Suddenly, my boyfriend’s penis was a bottle of Dimetapp. So not sexy. Also, it contains glycerin, so sensitive vaginas, beware. (more…)
Advice from three of our guy friends. This week they answer the following: Should I pay more attention to my boyfriend’s balls?
Straight Single Guy (Mark): Well, at least don’t forget about them. Getting past the generic notion that everyone’s preferences are different, and thus communication with your partner is key — absolutely true of course — I’d imagine that some guys rather enjoy the attention there, others could take it or leave it, and still others might even be quite averse to any focus there. It could even vary from session to session depending on the mood. I’d probably most equate it to nipples for gals — certainly an erotic component of the sensual buffet that shouldn’t be completely neglected by any means, but bottom line, they’re not the feature attraction. Pay attention to them to the extent that they’re a complementary ingredient to an exquisite main course, and accordingly, season to, um, taste.
Straight Married Guy (Figleaf): I’m sure it’s not what you meant, but if you don’t pay attention, you can accidentally hurt him. Which brings up the most important thing about paying attention to his balls: even if you’re careful, he still might flinch until he’s sure you won’t hurt them. The great news is the skin covering balls is marvelously sensitive. And responsive! Most women have had partners who can’t get enough of using a light touch to crinkle their nipples…and then to soften them again by cupping or mouthing to warm them back up again. You can do much the same thing to crinkle his balls and then relax them again. It won’t hurt him, the combination of sensations will feel good to him, and you may find it just as fascinating. Final hint? It feels wonderful to have one’s balls lightly tickled or scratched during orgasm.
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