Comment of the Week: What Really Matters in Bed

photo via Flickr

This comment by reader Erica got lost in the holiday shuffle, but it’s worth going back for. She made it in response to our post, 10 Reasons Why Your “Ugly Vagina” Is Normal and Gorgeous. We feel really bad for her 12-year-old self and hate the culture that created her, but are so happy to hear she’s come so far and evolved so much on this topic:

I have large inner lips. My partner has a smaller than average penis. We have incredible sex. Anyone who will judge you based on what your genitals look like, be they male or female, is a shallow ignorant loser and is definitely not worth your time or affection. I used to be intensely insecure about my labia because of crap I read online. I even tried to cut them off with a razor blade when I was twelve and ended up needing stitches, not to mention a psychological evaluation. Society places standards on every inch of the female body. It is impossible to meet them all. It took years but I have learned to love and accept myself. Also, I have had a lot of sex with both male and female partners and not one of them has ever turned me down or insulted my pussy. When people make stupid jokes or comments, call them out on it. It sucks that we have to deal with all of these sexist attacks. Resist by loving yourself and being nice to other women. Also be nice to guys and dont be a hypocrite by making fun of smaller penises. Size really does not matter; cleanliness and technique, not to mention confidence and being a nice person, is all that really matters.



One Comment

  1. I don’t have anything to add, I just really wanted to say thank you for this comment.
    I was also intensely insecure about the very same area of my body. I still am, though I fight it hard. I am married now, and my husband of course loves the way i look. It is still difficult for me, because we are taught to not be happy with the way we look. I have been insecure with my body since I was four or five (not exaggerating). So thank you so much for your comment, it helps put things in perspective, and reminds me of what I should truly be concerned with.

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