Dear Dr. Vanessa – My Boyf Accidentally Entered My Back Door

photo by Joe M500

Every few weeks, Dr. Vanessa Cullins, a board-certified obstetrician/gynecologist and vice president for medical affairs at Planned Parenthood® Federation of America, will be answering your questions here. To ask her your own question, click here.

A few days ago my boyfriend accidentally introduced his penis in my back hole (which, by the way, hurt so much) and immediately got back to the vagina. Now, three days later, more or less, it itches a lot. I’m afraid of having a serious infection. What should I do?

I’m not sure from your question where you’re itchy — in the anus or the vagina. The itching may or may not be associated with this particular act of intercourse. It might only be coincidental. So there are a few possibilities.

If the itch is in your anus, there are a few possible causes. The skin around your anus may have been split or torn when your boyfriend’s penis entered it; you may have a hemorrhoid that was irritated; or you may have contracted an infection from your boyfriend. You should visit your health care provider for an examination and talk about what STI testing might be useful. (Most sexually transmitted infections do not become symptomatic in three days, so if the itching is caused by an STI, you may have had the infection for some time without knowing it.)

If the itch is in your vagina, it is possible that fecal material (bowel movement material) was passed from your anus to your vagina, which could cause an infection rather quickly. You should see your health care provider for an examination and to discuss whether STI testing might be appropriate.

Whenever partners switch from anal intercourse to vaginal intercourse, it is important to first wash the penis after anal intercourse and before starting vaginal intercourse. If condoms are being used, be sure to replace the one used for anal intercourse with a fresh condom before beginning vaginal intercourse. This is also true when using sex toys. If fresh condoms are not used for each act, the toy should be cleaned before use in a different part of the body — or on a different partner.

Fecal material should always be kept out of the area of the vaginal canal and the vulva (i.e. a woman’s external sex organs, including the clitoris, the inner and outer labia, the opening to the vagina, the opening to the urethra, and two Bartholin’s glands). Fecal material can cause infection of the vulva, vagina, and bladder. When people enjoy anal sex, or when accidents happen, it is always important to clean up any fecal material as quickly as possible.

Best wishes for your good sexual health,

Planned Parenthood


  1. It has just happened to me, honest to god it was a complete accident and I had no idea it Could even happen.. and boy did it hurt. Like instant sobbing – couldn’t breath for a moment, hurting. Horrible. And now my butt hurts. So badly that it hurts to sit. Nothing has EVER been up therebefore and literally almost his whole dick went up there… idk what to do… doctor? No doctor?

  2. @AlanK & @Johnny It sure can happen by accident in the heat of the moment when angles are just-so and the man pulls out a bit too much before going back in. It happened with me and my wife.

  3. This can certainly happen by accident, and the lack of proper foreplay and lubrication is undoubtedly why it would have hurt so much.

    I think that men are occasionally smart enough to realize ‘accidental’ anal penetration is going to end badly, and it would be better to broach the subject with your partner and not just try to stab at her with your penis.

    Permission or not though, the real issue is the anal to vaginal contact not the suspected douchiness of the guy.

  4. Yeah … I agree … I’m pretty sure it’s never REALLY an accident. It’s pretty hard to get one’s penis into an asshole without foreplay and proper lubrication. You sort of have to make an active effort.

  5. ^Oh wait, it’s not exactly the same. I was doubting the physical possibility of this happening, not the guy’s intentions.


  6. ^Actually I was thinking the exact same thing. You can’t just “accidentally” slip a dick into a butt. You can accidentally give quite an uncomfortable exterior jab, but accidental anal insertion? No way.

  7. AlanK, what kind of comment is that? Yeah, it does occasionally happen accidentally. You’re going at fast and hard, and maybe somebody moves the wrong way. It happens. Way to leave a douchey comment.

  8. Accidentally? Yeah, and that porn on his computer was from a flyby download. Certainly somebody has been watching too much porn if they think they can “accidentally” find the wrong portal. Good grief. The right portal is the door through which you throw this guy.

    Always assuming you are telling the absolute truth and are not fibbing a little bit about not giving him at least implied permission.

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