Em & Lo's 1st Annual Hotscars

photo by miss karen

  • Most Disappointing Sex Scene: The Na’vi love scene in “Avatar.” Um, how could their tails NOT mesh? We’re waiting for the unrated version on Blu-Ray and it better deliver.
  • Couple with Least Chemistry: Meryl Streep and Steve Martin in “It’s Complicated”
  • Best Love-Conquers-All Message: “District 9”
  • Worst Treatment of Genitalia: “Antichrist”
  • Best Fodder for the Fantasies of Women Married with Kids: “17 Again”
  • Sweetest Love Story: “Up” (Also wins for Best First 10 Minutes of Any Movie Ever)
  • Best Idea with Worst Execution: “Jennifer’s Body”
  • Most Romance: “(500) Days of Summer” (Lo loved it)
  • Least Romance: “(500) Days of Summer” (Em hated it)
  • Most Unattractive (Yet Oddly Appealing, If You Ask Em) Love Interest: Jeff Bridges in “Crazy Heart.” The Dude should get an Oscar just for being willing to look so gross (e.g. the passed-out-in-his-underwear-next-to-the-toilet scene)
  • Sorriest Excuse for a Romantic Comedy: “Ghosts of Girlfriends Past”
  • Best (Albeit Cringe-worthy) Discussion of the G-Spot: Ethan Hawke in “New York, I Love You”
  • Best Gender Role Reversal: “Up in the Air”
  • Most Inspiring On-Screen Marriage: “Julie & Julia” (and we don’t mean the blogger’s)
  • Least Inspiring Use of Pen as Motif: “He’s Just Not That Into You” (sorry Justin Long, you are no Lloyd Dobler)
  • Special Recognition for Giving Hope to Teenage Virgins Everywhere: “Adventureland”

Discuss, disagree, debate in the comments below!

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  1. If I think of something I’ll let you know. I’ve been under rock so haven’t seen any of the movies. However, I did notice that there was an article that talked about the “tantric” elements of that Avatar love scene. I think it might have been in Salon.

  2. Ha! That’s funny. Totally missed that. Would it help if we capitalized it like hOtSCARS — or does that make it worse? Do you have any better pun-errific ideas?

  3. Am I the only one who when skimming the front page read “Hot Scars?”

    Probably am. I’ll go quietly…

  4. Agreed, Em&Lo! With most of your choices. Every time a commercial for “17 Again” came on the TV, I’d fretfully ask My Man, “Zack Effron is over 21, right?”

    God, I hope so. Or I may have to turn myself in. (Haven’t seen the movie, yet, (waiting for On Demand) but MY, he’s a fine young specimen of masculinity.)

    Adventureland was great! I kept forgetting the young man wasn’t that other always awkward Jewish Kid. Jeff Bridges and whats-her-name. Uh Uh. Older men are all right, fine, a good part of the time. But, damn, he looks like her worse for wear Grandpa in Crazy Heart. Julia Child and Paul were amazing. Best onscreen romance of the year, bar none! (Didn’t see “J’s Body”, “Summer” “Girlfriends Past” or any other movie classed as “Romance” so maybe that’s why. I avoid “Romantic Comedies” like the H1N1 Influenza.)

    I have yet to see Avatar. (there was sex in it?) Sorry. Just one of those things I didn’t get around to. Feel like I did when I was once the LAST person on Earth NOT on Facebook. What? What are they talking about? Is it worth the effort? Is it just hype?

    Oh my. Time to reactivate my Netflix account.

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