Top 10 Sex Tips for First Year College Students
For many young men and women, this week marks the start of a new chapter of life — one of higher learning, critical thinking, problem solving, horizon broadening, and lots and lots of casual bonking. It’s a whole new world of unchaperoned independence and freedom combined with 18-year-old hormones — which can result in a lot of really bad life decisions. Follow these rules to save yourself from (at least some) sex-related humiliation and regret up in your ivory tower.
- Keep your condom shelf fully stocked at all times. Whether you’re a man or a woman, make sure you keep a healthy supply of condoms on hand, for you, for your friends, for friends of friends. Invest in decent ones, with lubrication (but not spermicide), because everyone could use a little rehydration after a night of drinking (and let’s face it, you will have been drinking – see tip #3). Replace the condoms when they get close to their expiration date — because the only thing worse than not having a condom is having one that breaks mid sesh.
- Carry a condom on you at all times. Do you see a theme here? You never know when nookie is around the corner, especially on nights out. Keep a condom (more if you can manage it) cool and dry in a purse or loose pocket, not crammed in an overstuffed wallet or squeezed into the back pocket of your skinny jeans.
- Don’t do it drunk. You will get drunk. Too drunk. Way too drunk. Probably on more than one occasion. We’re not talking about a good, healthy buzz — because let’s face it, that’s the only time sex is going to happen for you this year — no, we’re talking completely sloshed. And when that happens, when your balance starts to fail and your voice gets really loud and the room spins a bit, try with all your might NOT to hook up. The chances of it not going well are exceedingly high. Think: poor sexual performance, blackouts, accusations of date rape, actual date rape, mid-sesh vomiting, forgotten birth control, accidental pregnancy, the list goes on.
- Have a no hook-up zone. Ground zero is your dorm room and the zone radiates out from there. The closer anyone lives to ground zero, the less advised you are to hook up with them. So: students in other dorms = fair game. Students in same dorm = proceed with caution. Students on same floor = enter (or be entered) at your own risk. Immediate neighbors = turn back now! Roommate = NO!!!
- Don’t sleep with anyone to get them to like you. This will not work. Sleep with someone because you are attracted to them and would like to have sex now, but only if you can do so without any expectations of a future relationship. If you think sex tonight means you’re dating tomorrow, think again.
- Avoid having sex in a fraternity/sorority house. But especially a fraternity house. Because in close-knit community living like that there are no boundaries: people will walk in on you while you’re doing it. Sometimes they’ll stay. They might try to take pictures.
- Don’t hook up with your friends’ exes. We know college is inherently incestuous. But you’ve got four more years with your friends. Don’t make it awkward.
- Be open and honest about STDs. You’re jumping into a pool of smart, well educated, fun, attractive, decent people — many of whom have sexually transmitted diseases. Hell, you probably have one right now too! There’s nothing shameful about that — it’s just statistics. But that doesn’t mean you can shirk your civic responsibility to be honest about anything you’ve got that might be transferrable — oral herpes counts too! The more people talk about it, the less stigma there will be, and the smarter everyone can be about protecting themselves and the ones they lust.
- Don’t schtupp your professor. It’s so cliche. The affair might feel naughty and transgressive, but ultimately it’s an abuse of power on their part. Plus, it’s not worth it for the inevitable mediocre B you’ll get.
- Get familiar with your health center. The good ones will have free condoms, STD information and check-ups, Plan B and pregnancy tests. The health center is your friend.
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I’m now on my 2nd year in college. Well alone in my own condo that my parents bought me. One night me and my boyfriend were watching some se* videos and suddenly he grabbed my breasts. Then I refused to have sex with him because we did’nt have a condom or pills. Then the next morning. I red about this, and it all goes to heaven between the two of us, it was our first time. I would be willing to do more with him. <3 Thanks for this amazing tips. And maybe later tonight will be doing it again. 😉
Women don’t fall for a guy thinking that if you give him sex he will want to have a relationship with you. Hold off on the sex unless and until you are in a serious relationship. Trust me guys at this age look at sex as recreational and once they do you they are on to the next conquest.
Guys don’t take advantage of women and don’t just use them like a piece of meat. Sex is only best when done in a committed relatioship. And learn to do it better. You can learn at my blog at marriagecoach1.com
^ Yeah, you’re right.
Stop baiting Johnny. You and I both know that ancient religions will not possibly have a fair or healthy view on modern sex.
^ Ok. Are punishments for transgression of these rules and moral values equally applied to men and women? If a man and a woman are both caught having sex before marriage, will they both receive the same punishment under religious law? I’m not talking afterlife, here. I mean in terms of social and, where it applies, punitive repercussion.
Islam is the ideal way of life on earth. Both Men and Women have same moral values. According to religion it is a sin to do such activity before marriage and is only allowed after marriage. this applied on both husband and wife or men and women before marriage.
^ What about men? Are men allowed to have sex without marriage?
In our religion, no girl is allowed to have sex without Marriage and i think it’s the best solution to Sex Frustration. No diseases and side effects at all.
ISLAM is indeed a religion of peace and prosperity.
As someone who has recently graduated college I think this list is great! I had the chance to lose my virginity while I was black-out drunk after a frat party. And I am so proud of myself that I was able to tell the guy no (and we are still friends to this day), it was the best decision I have ever made. I know most college girls would not have been in the state to say no, and I recommend to all of them to always keep a best girl friend around and know your limits.
If alcohol is part of your ordinary life, then it’s likely to be part of your sex life, true — but lots and lots of college students who aren’t abstainers have not yet become regular drinkers. I didn’t drink for months at a time in college, not because I was consciously avoiding it, but because it wasn’t a habit yet, just as I hadn’t taken up drinking coffee regularly. I can’t remember whether my first college boyfriend and I ever even had a drink together. I can only remember once having sex when I was actually drunk, and then it was planned that way beforehand. (“We’re going to GET DRUNK and have CASUAL SEX and it will be AWESOME!”*)
Moreover, typical scheduling for sex in dorms isn’t necessarily likely to coincide with the time of day that one is likely to be drunk. It tends to go more like, “Well, Wednesday afternoon I have a long lab anyway, so you and X can have the room then.”
*it was not awesome**
**it was not horrible, either
Lexi, we weren’t saying that a good healthy buzz is *necessary* to have sex — we were just trying to acknowledge that most college students will be at least a little buzzed when having sex. We realize that it’s unreasonable to expect that college students will stay stone cold sober in order to hook up. Sure, there are students who prefer to do it sober, and some who never drink at all, but we were simply preaching to the masses… i.e. if you must drink and screw (and, let’s face it, most students to), at least make sure you’re just buzzed rather than stumbling drunk.
Personally, as someone who just came out of university, I was disappointed in this. This just increases the pressure for people to fit in in college by drinking and having casual sex. A caveat: I have nothing against casual sex or drinking. However, there are so many people who don’t fit into the party culture in college, and this just reinforces that it’s not okay for them to be themselves. I am so baffled as to why you would tell people that when they have “a good, healthy buzz” is “the only time sex is going to happen for you this year.” If you have to be buzzed to sleep with someone, maybe you’re not making the best choices. Way to isolate a whole swath of college students who could have benefited from some honest advice.
Oh and never drink alone! Always have that one sober best friend who keeps watch on you. 🙂
Wow, these are such great rules.
#3 is the best (best advice in general, best presentation, best explanation of gradations of condition and consequence.) The others are just really good.
figleaf
How about, girls should keep a few brands of condoms on hand. You don’t want a guy trying to use one that’s not the right size/shape.