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Dream Interpretation: On a Beach, Everyone Had a Giant Penis

October 23, 2014

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photo via flickr

Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it (18 and older only, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri:

i had a dream where i went to a beautiful beach and was enjoying the scenic sunset beauty. suddenly, i got shocked by seeing a naked guy go for a swim in the sea. he had an amazing big penis. aroused, i smiled and ogled at him for a little while. then, i got up to go out for a walk along the waterline. many people were enjoying the evening. i found many guys sitting naked or semi-naked. they were all in various activities – all relaxing in their own way, some sitting and lazying, some reading, some sprawled out. notable was that all of them had big penises. some of them had limp penises and some were erect… but all of them were big… i remember thinking, hey in this part of city, all the guys have big penises.

Lauri:¬†I have this suspicion that many of Em & Lo’s readers would like to know in what city your dream took place! Anyhoo, as delightfully phallic as your dream is, it is really all about you.

The beach setting and the nakedness are all about freedom and getting things out in the open. In real life have you recently gotten something off your chest or opened up about something? Penises in dreams tend to be connected to one’s assertiveness and ability to “stand firm” about certain issues. And usually the bigger something is in a dream the bigger a deal it is in real life.

So what I am getting from this dream is that you may have recently “grown a pair,” so to speak, and “stood up” for yourself in some way… in a BIG way. And in doing so, it brought about a certain sense of freedom, which is great! Because when we hold things in or don’t stand up for ourselves, we become imprisoned by fear and worry.

Life’s too short for that nonsense. Live life in a big way while you’re here. And your dream suggests you are doing just that!

Dreamer’s Response: the interpretation is bang on … i am going through a tough phase of life, which is making me take a lot of tough decisions. i am a very emotional person, and generally avoid taking such tough stances… but, i did take the decision to put an end to a toxic relationship and friendships. my boyfriend and friends, were taking me and my friendship for granted. this year, i evaluated the space they were giving me and decided that i was bettter off alone, than being in the company of people who were making me feeling less than what i was and were not appreciating me… so i bid goodbye to long-standing friendships and that was taking a toll on me. i decided to begin anew and invest my emotions more carefully than what i had done in the past and have been hurt pretty badly.

 

Visit Lauri’s site,¬†WhatYourDreamMeans.com, for even more dream interpretations! If you want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning, then check out her latest book,¬†Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, which will give you the tools you need to become a dream expert, too.¬†Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

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Dream Interpretation: I Cheated on Hubby with My Abusive Ex

October 16, 2014

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Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it (18 and older only, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri:

Yesterday while taking a nap, I found myself dreaming that my ex-boyfriend showed up at my home and I proceeded to cheat on my husband with him. (Side note, my ex-boyfriend was both emotionally and physically abusive and cheated on me several times during our relationship. Plus, we broke up nearly 6 years ago and I’m now happily married with two beautiful daughters.)

Anyway, in the dream we had amazing sex (he wasn’t that good in real life). Shortly after, however, my husband, a friend of ours, and some other people showed up. I wasn’t caught by anyone, but I felt horrible. I kept saying over and over, “I can’t believe I cheated on him. I would never do something like this. I love my husband.” I really felt horrible, and wanted to keep this a secret, but I knew my husband would find out, regardless of whether I told him or not. Of course, our friend saw my ex there and wondered why he was there.

I finally yelled at my ex and told him to get the f*** out of my house. He left, and I felt terrible. I woke myself up and was extremely thankful it was just a dream. I don’t like thinking about my ex, but this dream has disturbed me significantly. Usually when I dream about him, he is always trying to get back with me (which he did in reality for years after we split), and I always tell him to leave me alone, I’m in love with my husband. I just want to know what this dream means, so maybe I won’t have this dream anymore.

Lauri: Unfortunately, when you get out of an abusive relationship, you are never fully out of it, because the emotional scars remain and will show up in your dreams. The element of feeling horrible about cheating on your hubby with your abusive ex is a tell-tale sign that remnants of that relationship show up every now and then and affect your marriage.

Do you still have trust issues? Do you have a difficult time handling arguments with hubby? What sort of behaviors do you sometimes exhibit that stem from when you were in the abusive relationship? Odds are, around the time you had this dream something must have happened, you must have said something or behaved in a manner that made you feel guilty, which is why you had so much guilt in the dream. Just as you said, “I would never do this to my husband” in the dream, what did you do or say in real life that is not like you? Did you sneak a look at his phone? Did you get irrational in an argument? Whatever it is, you are fully aware that were it not for that abusive relationship, you never would have done it.

The way you tell him to get the f*** out of your house in the dream is really you demanding that he get the f*** out of your psyche because clearly, as evidenced by this dream, he is still “screwing” with you psychologically rather than physically. He’s not in your life anymore but emotional scars from him are.

If this is a frequent thing, I would urge you to get help with it. Far too often past relationships continue to play an unhealthy role in current relationships because we haven’t been able to fully let go of the pain, the fear, the distrust, etc. I have partnered with a psychologist and we specialize in this sort of issue. If you are interested in getting help, we can help you in just one to three sessions, as opposed to months of therapy. You can find out more at DreamingtoHealing.com.

 

Visit Lauri’s site,¬†WhatYourDreamMeans.com, for even more dream interpretations! If you want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning, then check out her latest book,¬†Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, which will give you the tools you need to become a dream expert, too.¬†Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

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Dream Interpretation: I Dreamed of the Guy Who Asked Me to Get an Abortion

October 9, 2014

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Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it (18 and older only, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri:

I keep having dreams of a guy I had a fling with 3 years ago. I ended up getting pregnant and thought it was his and he wanted me to abort. Thank goodness I kept it and it was not his. That made me lose all respect for him, so why in the world does he keep popping up in my dreams?

Lauri:¬†That is a good question and hopefully I can help you! You didn’t provide any details from the dreams, so I will do my best with what you’ve given me.

We tend to dream about things that are affecting us the most because our dreams are trying to help us out with it. While the guy may not be affecting you, odds are, remnants from the situation remain and that is what is affecting you. The guy has become a symbol for it. He wanted you to cut your pregnancy short but instead you allowed your pregnancy to go to term and you were rewarded with, not only a beautiful child, but also with the knowledge that he was not the father. A valuable lesson was learned.

So perhaps he is showing up in your dreams now because something else is going on in your life that you are feeling pressure (from others or even self imposed pressure) to put an end to. He could be a subconscious reminder that it is best to allow something to play out or to go ahead and follow through with something rather than putting a stop to it.

Life is full of mistakes that result in valuable lessons. Those lessons will often be imprinted into our subconscious minds in the form of the person who helped us learn the lesson. So remember, the dreams are probably not about him but rather the lesson that miserable sumabitch taught ya: don’t be like this guy and give up prematurely!
Visit Lauri’s brand new site,¬†WhatYourDreamMeans.com, for even more dream interpretations! If you want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning, then check out her latest book,¬†Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, which will give you the tools you need to become a dream expert, too.¬†Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

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Dream Interpretation: My Two Best Friends Kissed Each Other

October 2, 2014

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Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it (18 and older only, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri:

So last night I had a weird dream where I was with three other friends, and I think I’m bi, and two of my friends kinda like progressed through a relationship throughout the dream. They eventually starting kissing right in front of us and it was my best friend and another friend of mine. I think the characters were those people because all of us are on the volleyball team and we had a game last night. I don’t remember who the other person was who was with me, but I remember how they were always kissing and holding hands. They’re both girls. What does this mean?

Lauri:¬†It’s not likely that this dream means that these two friends of yours have “special feelings” for each other. However, it may mean that they have connected in some way, causing you to feel somewhat left out.

You mentioned that you are all on a team together and had a game the day prior to the dream. Do you recall if these two friends united as teammates and progressed the game through their teamwork with each other? I think the progression is an important element to this dream. Are they progressing as players? Or perhaps they had a pretty involved and intimate conversation recently that you were aware of.

Remember, kissing in dreams is more often about communication in real life than it is about an actual desire to make out. The holding hands in this dream does show a united front, so I can’t help but feel this may be about how they are progressing as teammates. But you should also ask yourself if they had a united front in some other way.

Finally, it is also possible that they both symbolize something you want in a relationship for yourself. Is there a quality that each possesses that you like? Your dream may be showing you that, for example, friend A’s sense of humor is really attractive and friend B’s ability to be a good listener is pretty great, too, and these are two qualities you want in your ideal partner and two qualities that will allow a relationship to progress. Whatever the case, it’s all good, baby!

 

Visit Lauri’s brand new site,¬†WhatYourDreamMeans.com, for even more dream interpretations! If you want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning, then check out her latest book,¬†Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, which will give you the tools you need to become a dream expert, too.¬†Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

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How to Figure Out What Your Sex Dream Means

September 25, 2014

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photo via flickr

Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it (18 and older only, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri:

Last night I had a dream that I was at a school for a “lock-in” or something of that nature. During this event, I let a gay man perform cunnilingus on me while surrounded by people that I knew; however, I was not able to make out any faces. No one seemed to be bothered by it for whatever reason. I really seemed to be enjoying it, so much that I covered his face with a blanket and began to gyrate his face — and I also felt aroused in my sleep. It was really weird, but I have been having all sorts of weird dreams lately. I looked on different sites but could not find anything close to the actual dream, “heterosexual women has oral sex with a homosexual man…and likes it”! Please give me some insight!

Lauri: Here are some tips to help you figure out your dreams in the future:

1. Your dreams are always about you. Everything and everyone in your dream represents some part of your own self and some part of your life.

2. Your dreams can always be connected to something from the previous day: something that happened, something you talked about, something that was on your mind.

3. I have a really good book that will help you understand your dreams like never before! It’s called Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams, Change Your Life, and you can get it here.

Now, knowing that everything in your dream is some part of you, let’s see if we can figure out what this gay man represents. Usually, when a woman dreams of an unknown gay man, he will represent her male, assertive energy, the part of her that “has balls,” so to speak. But your male self is gay… but was behaving in a very heterosexual manner. This may mean that you aren’t recognizing your male assertive side for what it really is. This may be why you covered his face with a blanket. Is there something you are wanting to keep under wraps right now? Or something you do not want to have to face?

Oral sex in a dream is actually about intimate conversation in real life. (anytime the mouth is involved in some form or fashion in a dream you need to look at your recent, real life communications). You were the receiver in the dream, so perhaps you were recently told something that excited you but that you don’t want others to know.

And typically when other people in a dream could care less about what you are doing, like when we’re naked in public but no one else seems to notice or care, it’s because your wise dreaming mind is trying to show you that the particular issue you are concerned about is not anything anyone else in your real life is giving any energy to.

So ask yourself what is it right now that has you excited yet concerned? The message of the dream is, don’t sweat what others may think about it. This is all about you and not them.

Visit Lauri’s brand new site,¬†WhatYourDreamMeans.com, for even more dream interpretations! If you want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning, then check out her latest book,¬†Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, which will give you the tools you need to become a dream expert, too.¬†Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

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Dream Interpretation: I’m Gay But Keep Dreaming About My Straight Friend

September 18, 2014

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photo via flickr

Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it (18 and older only, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri:

I’m a gay guy, 23, and I’ve been having dreams about my straight best friend –¬†either sex or making out or just being romantic with him. I’ve known him since I was 14. It’s getting a little weird. In real life I don’t believe I fancy the guy, and I certainly don’t want to, as nothing good is ever going to come from that. He’s really open but I’m 100% sure he’s straight.¬†Last night I dreamt I was just holding hands and kissing him and felt amazing about it.¬†Is it just a dream and I should make nothing of it, or is it telling me something?

Lauri: It rubs my fur the wrong way when someone dismisses a dream as “just a dream.” I understand that it’s what we tell ourselves to shake off the realness of the dream, but the truth is, a dream — no matter how disturbing — is a very powerful message from you, to you and about you.

Your dream, while confusing, is a powerful message as well. It’s not a message encouraging you to ravage your friend, but rather a message reflecting the intimacy of your friendship. While there is no sexual intimacy between the two of you, there is probably emotional and intellectual intimacy. Make out sessions in dreams usually reflect deep conversation in real life because, like kissing, it takes two mouths to communicate.¬† The deeper the kiss in the dream, the deeper the conversation in real life.

Sex in dreams often reflects a “coming together” of the minds. And sex is the ultimate union, two separate bodies joining together as one. The dreaming mind will use sex to symbolize how you may have united politically, emotionally, religiously, etc. with someone else.

This is why so many of our sex dreams involve someone we are not attracted to. It’s not the physical union you want but rather the psychological union you need. ¬†So yes, make nothing of your dream being about the physical plane, but do make something of it being about the psychological plane. You and your best friend are friends for a reason! You two have a united front psychologically. You totally get each other. And rest assured, now that you know what the dream means, odds are you won’t get it again.

Visit Lauri’s brand new site,¬†WhatYourDreamMeans.com, for even more dream interpretations! If you want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning, then check out her latest book,¬†Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, which will give you the tools you need to become a dream expert, too.¬†Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

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Dream Interpretation: Why Do I Cheat On My Boyfriend in My Dreams?

September 11, 2014

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Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it (18 and older only, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri:

I keep having dreams that I cheat on my boyfriend. We have been dating for about a year, and we’re very much in love. I have absolutely no interest in cheating on him whatsoever. However, in the past week, I’ve dreamt about cheating twice. The first time, with an old fling. The second time, with a (married) man I do not know. Each time there was sex involved. My boyfriend and I have a SUPER healthy sex life; I am not dissatisfied. But I am, however, confused. What do these dreams mean, and why do I keep having them?

Lauri: Cheating in the dream world is a very common occurrence; however, we tend to be the cheated more than be the cheater. In either case, it is usually because, ¬†in real life, there is some form of a third wheel in the relationship — and it’s usually a thing rather than a person. By thing I mean work, a project, a hobby some sort of extracurricular activity that is taking a lot of the dream cheater’s time and attention.

You’re the cheater in this case, so what is it you are giving yourself to more than you should? Or perhaps more than your boyfriend would like? Hanging with your friends? Taking selfies? (Kidding!) Your job? Whatever it is, deep down you know it is causing somewhat of a divide… it is causing you, or perhaps just your boyfriend, to feel “cheated” out of quality time together.

If you can cut back on the amount of time you devote to this third wheel activity, you probably should. If you can’t because your income or education depends on it, then make sure the time you spend with your boyfriend is well spent and that he feels like HE is #1 in your life, not this other time and attention sucking element. When you do that, your subconscious guilt will ease up and the dreams will stop.

Visit Lauri’s brand new site,¬†WhatYourDreamMeans.com, for even more dream interpretations! If you want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning, then check out her latest book,¬†Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, which will give you the tools you need to become a dream expert, too.¬†Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

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Dream Interpretation: I Had Sex with a Masked Man

August 28, 2014

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Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it (18 and older only, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri:

I dreamt that it was Halloween and I was walking next to a house with a really big display and haunted house when someone runs at me wearing a mask and yelling so I run away. They grab me laughing and take off their mask and it turns out that it’s a man that I know from high school that I’ve previously had sex with and he had a small crush on me. He invites me into his house to hangout. We end up in this barn type enclosure full of hay and we start kissing and have very sweet but intense sex on top of the hay. Then someone walks in on us and my dream is over.

Lauri: Unless this guy has been on your mind or you’ve interacted with him right before this dream, he is probably not playing himself. Instead, he represents some part of yourself that you have masked.

Have you been putting on a front, putting on a display or an act that is not how you truly are? Maybe even putting on a false image of yourself on social media? Whatever the case, your dream seems to be telling you that it is time to remove the façade, put on a brave face and be yourself.

I think your dreaming mind chose to use the guy that used to crush on you to show you that you are totally likeable exactly the way you are; no need to behave in a way that is not true to yourself. The barn and the hay are all about simplifying your life and ridding yourself of unnecessary complications. And the way your dream ends is always where the most important part of the message is… you have a fear of getting caught, getting found out. Come clean before this situation “haunts” you!

 

Visit Lauri’s brand new site,¬†WhatYourDreamMeans.com, for even more dream interpretations! If you want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning, then check out her latest book,¬†Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, which will give you the tools you need to become a dream expert, too.¬†Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

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Dream Interpretation: I Dreamed My Boyfriend Was Two People

August 21, 2014

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Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it (18 and older only, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri:

I had an interesting dream last night where I had been with my boyfriend for a while, but I had began to develop feelings for a new man. The current boyfriend I was with was stubborn, aggressive, impolite, and disrespectful, while the new one was generous, funny, sweet, gentle, and in turn, much more handsome and attractive to me, than my current, not-so-kind boyfriend.

The new man and I would passionately kiss and hold hands and talk about how nice it was being with each other, behind my boyfriend’s back. The thing was that my negative boyfriend and the positive new man were friends — since before I knew either of them.¬†One day the three of us were all together in my room and all of a sudden I started kissing the newer man in front of my boyfriend! My boyfriend became enraged and I felt so guilty. He said I could never speak to his friend again and that he was so stupid for trusting the two of us.

It wasn’t until I woke up that I realized that my boyfriend of two years was both of these men. The current boyfriend I was with had all the less attractive qualities of my boyfriend, while the new man had all his amazing qualities that encourage me to be with him today.

Our relationship has been a little rocky lately and his bipolar sometimes gets in the way of his better qualities. I love him very much and I see us being together for quite some time. I feel this dream has to mean something though. Does it?

Lauri: It certainly does! Bipolar is a very difficult disorder to have and to manage. And that’s what you have to do: manage it, with medication, routine, etc. The loved ones of the individual with bipolar have to manage it as well, and that is precisely what this dream is trying to help you do.

I always say, we are so much wiser when we dream; it is when we do our best thinking. Your dream is giving you a new perspective on your boyfriend’s disorder by showing him to you as two different people… two very different people that both love you. So if you can perceive him as the two boyfriends in your dream, and treat him as such, it may help you quite a bit in real life.

When he’s the aggressive, impolite boyfriend, try to be a calming force for him. When he’s the sweet and funny boyfriend, enjoy the hell out of him. But keep in mind, no matter which boyfriend you are with at any given time, that boyfriend loves you.

Oh, and the guilt you feel in the dream, and your boyfriend’s anger about you kissing and enjoying the other boyfriend — that is really YOUR own guilt. You may find yourself feeling guilty over thoughts of disliking him when he is impolite and stubborn. Don’t beat yourself up over it. That’s natural and it’s okay.

 

Visit Lauri’s brand new site,¬†WhatYourDreamMeans.com, for even more dream interpretations! If you want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning, then check out her latest book,¬†Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, which will give you the tools you need to become a dream expert, too.¬†Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

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Dream Interpretation: I Keep Dreaming About My Old Classmates

August 15, 2014

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Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it (18 and older only, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri:

All of my life I went to school with the same people, up until high school, when my family moved. So for eight years I had almost every class with the same 20 people, and these people from my childhood keep coming up in my dreams.

The dreams follow the same story line, where all 20 of us go on a field trip at our current ages (19/20). I always end up around my first ex and my first huge crush (J and B) and I always end up making myself look stupid somehow. (It may be important to note that I was always extremely nervous around J and B and I had a years-long on and off thing that wasn’t resolved before I moved).

Recently, there was a new addition to my dreams where, after the embarrassment, I find my old best friend, E, and we end up having sex somewhere quick, like a bathroom cubicle (I’m asexual and she’s bi). I just want to know why, after six years of not speaking to or seeing any of those people, I keep having dreams about them.

Lauri: It’s very common to dream of people from our past, even decades after the last time we saw them. The reason why this is, is because these various people leave an impression on us and become a symbol for some part of our self.

These people were a big part of your “coming of age.” So you may find that you dream of them whenever the idea or the question of getting into a relationship enters your mind.

The way you keep embarrassing yourself in front of them in the dream suggests that you are feeling embarrassed about some part of you in real life. Do you have a lot of concern about how being asexual may look to others? Is that something that is hard for you to share or explain? I would imagine that being asexual, whether it is something you are embarrassed about or not, could be a difficult thing from time to time, because of the societal pressure that you’re supposed to be in a relationship or at least looking for one.

What I think this dream is trying to show you is that the most important relationship you can have is being your own best friend (so many of us are way too hard and critical of ourselves, rather than being forgiving and supportive of our selves). That’s what your old best friend E symbolizes, the friendship you need to have with yourself: like yourself, enjoy your own company, forgive yourself, encourage yourself, etc. just as a good friend would. You have sex with her in the dream because sex symbolizes the merging of someone else’s qualities into yourself.

I think the fact that she is bi is also important. She’s attracted to both sexes, while you are not attracted to either. Society may be causing you to feel pressured to take on some sort of preference. I say for now, just focus on the friend quality that she represents and start working on liking all the wonderful, unique and even quirky things about you! When you like yourself, others can’t help but like the hell out of you, too!

 

Visit Lauri’s brand new site,¬†WhatYourDreamMeans.com, for even more dream interpretations! If you want to be able to figure out your own dreams every morning, then check out her latest book,¬†Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, which will give you the tools you need to become a dream expert, too.¬†Check out all of Lauri’s books here.

 

 

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