Dear Em & Lo,
About six months ago I broke up with my boyfriend of 18 months and have recently met someone new. The other day the new boy and I were engaging in some hands-on action which led me to discover that he nowhere near measured up to my ex. The new boy was around 4-6″. My problem is that I’m really worried about having sex with him because my ex was over 8″. I feel really disappointed and I know that 8″ is a high bar that’s been set. Am I bad person for thinking he has a small penis or should I go looking for something more? Why can’t good-looking men come with the measurements of their penis tattooed onto their wrist or something? The problems and surprises that would solve.
–Sizeist
Dear Sizeist,
We almost didn’t print your letter because of the emotional damage it might inflict on insecure men everywhere. It’s the secret fear that everyone — male and female — experiences at some point in their hook-up life: Am I being compared to my partner’s ex(es)? And if so, am I failing to measure up?
But on behalf of all the average-sized men out there, i.e. the vast majority of men, we highly recommend you give Mr. 4-6″ a chance. You’ve heard about society’s unfair expectation that women try to live up to impossible female beauty standards, right? Well, you’re doing the same thing, except with men and their dicks.
First, you need to understand that, statistically speaking, 8 inches is abberantly long; out of 100 men, only 5 will be longer than 6.3 inches! (Was it really 8 inches, or are you just bad at spatial reasoning?) It’s not like 8-inchers grow on trees and you’ve dated a string of giants and have come to discover (pun intended) that only super-sized schlongs can satisfy you. No, you just had one great experience with one rare “8-inch“ penis. And this is by no means a guarantee that sex with a 4-6″ penis will feel only 50-75% as great.
For a start, some men with big swinging dicks can get lazy in the sack, assuming that size is the only thing that matters. They may also assume that intercourse is the only thing that matters — and we all know how few women climax from intercourse alone; remember, orgasm achieved through non-penile means still counts as sex. Oral, manual, anal, toys — it’s all good, and in many cases, better! Not to mention, you may suddenly discover new penetration positions that you really enjoy — positions that perhaps were not so comfortable with a larger specimen. Oh, and don’t forget that, for the standard vagina, the majority of sensation is felt and enjoyed in its outer third, thanks to the extensions of the clitoris, the g-spot, and the pelvic floor muscles around the lower part of the vaginal canal (and also since a lot of women don’t enjoy having their cervix pummeled with a battering ram).
On a final note: Maybe he was nervous and not fully inflated, as it were. Basically, you have no idea what more extended and extensive sexual interludes are going to be like with this man. So if you dig him (and we surely hope the handwork you exchanged means that you do), why not find out whether the motion of his ocean can get the job done?
Of course, we can’t discount the fact that you may simply be less attracted to him (or not attracted to him at all) now that you’ve scoped out his unit — you like what you like. This doesn’t necessarily make you a bad person, though you are severely limiting your dating options. We suppose you could post a dating profile specifying that only 8″-penis-owners need reply. But something tells us that’s not exactly the way to find the next Boyfriend of the Year. Here’s a better idea: Spend some quality time with an average-sized penis and see if the experience — or the person himself — converts you? He is a human being after all, not a piece of meat.
Size is just a number,
Em & Lo
I believe ive just read several pages full of people posting as other genders yes indeed,like mentioned above by another poster when women pretend to be guys its obvious they say things a guy would never say.Hmmm..someone on this site really despises men,
Just because half of you guys on here probably have a small penis yet claim you’re packing heat kills me! Then you’ve got the idiot below who claims women have to be posting half of the comments because God forbid a man have a small penis. You jackasses have been making women objects since the beginning of time, alI I hear men say is big boobs this, big ass that. So what women are finally calling you out on your small penis and the fact that most of you don’t even begin to know how to use them or pleasure a woman!
As a man of 27 with a nearly 5″ penis can I say that I have no hangups. When younger I was used to my classmates being bigger and hairier than me. In the locker room and showers I never hid. At 16 I had about 1 and a half inches and a few hairs. Nobody laughed. I was used to being seen because at a school-boarding-everybody saw everyone else. The 13 and 14 yearolds were ofen longer and thicker than me. Not a problem. Only once has a woman told me i was too small and that she could not feel anything.
@ to da fools claimin’ dey bfs have over seven.Very few dudes (of any race)percentile-wise even over seven so get real and wake up fool.Gettin themselves off with dey fingers can also get off with a small to average stick.
Okay, My girfriend was married to a guy who.she claims had 8. I myself am close to that, and a little over on a really good day. But she has also been with guys who were 5 -6 inches and claims that the sex she had with one of the smaller guys was better than the sex she had with her ex husband or me at first. What matters most is getting to know her and what she likes. Once you figure that out, it doesnt matter how small or big you are. Women are a little different than men when it comes to sex. Us guys its usualy all a physical thing, (which is why we are so obsessed with the size of our business) but for most women it is much more than that. Or at least that is what I have learned in my exp.
Hi there sizeist,
On behalf of all the 5-inchers out there, I would like to extend a solemn thank you for being honest about your feelings. It truly is refreshing to hear this, and is a perfect set up for my two-cents. In my opinion, you should tell your boyfriend that he doesn’t measure up to your last ex. If he still wants to screw, you know you’ve got a winner on your hands – someone who doesn’t care about what you think and who probably end up making a lot of money. I know it sounds shallow, but guys who care always finish last. It’s just the way of the world, small or hung. So for all the average fellas out there, my advice is this: go to school, get rich, and don’t ever care about what women think. Who cares if she has an orgasm?! If she cheats, you can move on to someone hotter! Money truly is the great equalizer to dick size, and in this day and age, evolution favors wealth over braun (thank you, Darwin!).
Also,”some” of these folks supposedly posting under male names are really females attempting to try and make guys look insecure.I know because im a guy and some of the comments DEFINITELY did not come from a guy–trust me.Might wanna try a little harder girls…smh
…the letter is fake (either written by someone here or some internet liar)complete and total BS.It was put up to get a controversial dialog going and to shame men in the process.If they had a speck of integrity they’d pull this thread or at least lock it from further comment.
I totally agree with Jon, Women these days are f*cked up, Tbh, Half of you couldn’t give a damn about the guy himself just as long as hes got a ‘Remarkable’ shaft. Its just amazing how you can determine a guy by one piece of clothing being taken off, And you call us men judgemental, Wow .. .
I agree. These women really have totally screwed-up priorities and values. How they can determine whether or not they want to have sex with someone or have a relationship with someone based on the size of body part is 100% pathetic.
Honestly wtf? im not small by any means but it irritates me to see all these bitches talking about size like its the end of the world. Girls talk 24/7 about guys objectifying them etc…and yet some chick says she doest wanna break up because he has a big dick…really? thats all youd lose? Go get a get a male prosy…idk whether size matters or not but i know its way better when you actually love the person…so figure that out and worry about the rest later.
Love is what matters, not penis size.
Remember girls, “It’s NOT the size of the Wand, it’s the Magic of the MAGICIAN.”
!!!!!!!! Penis (all of ’em) ROCK!!!!!!!
I wonder if you size queens make fun of people in wheelchairs and other handicapped people too? Guys with small penises can’t help it. You women can help how you behave though. If you’re basing a relationship primarily on penis size, how dumb are you? Pretty dumb. Sadly, for us guys with small penises, there are far too many women this dumb out there.
I totally agree. It comes down to these size queen women who are not only cruel and shallow but extremely stupid and ignorant as well.
4 is kinda getting small-ish but 5-6 is normal & completely respectable-gimme a break !!
Actually, 4 is still respectable. Anything under 4 starts to get into small territory but can still be capable of sexually satisfying a woman regardless of size. I agree that women complaining about 5-6 where the majority of men factually measure is ridiculous.
I have this lady who I loved so much and we had sex on several times with her though I accept it that I have small Dick but all over sudden, she walked out of my life that I don’t satisfy her sex need and she wanted me to allow her cheat on me of which I could not. I still believe that there is one out there for me and love is not only about sex and sex is not only about big dick.
You will experience what you couldn’t have experienced anywhere if you give your guy time and real love. I am looking for one to love too.
I am so sorry this happened to you. You were deeply in love with her but the feeling obviously wasn’t mutual. If she loved you, she never would’ve done something so mean and cruel. She obviously has no compassion nor love in her heart. Men are better off without shallow women like that in their lives. I hope you find a woman who truly is about love and compassion. Remember, love is what matters, not penis is size. You understand this. She didn’t.
man to be honest ive had girlfriends and i never had any complaints about my size or performances but what i dont get is all these women want an endowed man but once they get one a lot of times the relationship is only about sex whats up with that