Comment of the Week: Normal Schmormal!

Reader Dave wrote the following in response to the Your Call “Is It Normal to Not Want Sex?”, but it’s so spot on we think it could apply to almost any sexual preference:

I think you are asking the wrong question.  The question should never be “Am I normal?”  The question should be “Are you happy the way you are?”

I don’t care if you are into girls or into guys.  I don’t care if both sexes turn you on or neither do.  If you are happy with your life then there is no reason for you to change.

Only if you are unhappy should you change and don’t let “normal” affect your happiness because if we were all normal the world would be a really boring place.

Find what makes you happy.



  1. Sexual orientation is not a disease, and it not something that can be “cured.” Even if Alan doesn’t mean to pathologize gays, lesbians, and bisexuals, who all exist on the spectrum of what constitutes “normal” human sexuality, the comment is still off base. And sexual orientation can’t be changed, with “hormones” or any other methods. So basically, Alan is quite wrong.

  2. This is both true and not true. Yes, one should be comfortable with one’s orientation. But sometimes the orientation is the result of a problem that should be fixed. Just as an example, a belief that nothing can help depression is itself a symptom of depression. So first check with a doctor that the issue isn’t happiness with one’s choice but rather a hormone problem. Being happy with a disease doesn’t make it less of a disease.

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