Comment of the Week: A Great Date Mistaken for Emasculation

photo by Albany Tim

We couldn’t believe this crazy story from BCofUIMhere in response to our Wise Guys Post “Can’t Women Ask Men Out?” It made us so thankful that we live in more enlightened times. Which then got us thinking, Do we really?

The last time I asked a guy out was probably before EM & LO were born (1985).  I asked him out, picked him up, brought him flowers.  The date was a classic dinner and a movie, I paid for both (because I asked him out).  We took a walk, in the moonlight, I dropped him off, told him I had a really nice time and hoped he did too.  We had a good night kiss (just a kiss, I treated him like a total gentleman) and went home.  The next day, he called and screamed (!) at me that I treated him like a p***y, hung up and I never saw him again.


  1. As far as I know, in 1985, there were no guidelines about asking a guy out, because it just wasn’t *done*. Everything I did was based on what Emily Post said should be done on a date (except for that whole “guy asks the girl” part ;). I was young (19) and clueless.

    The reason I did it was, I’d never been on a date at that point in my life and figured if I was ever going to be, I was going to have to take the bull by the horns, so to speak.

    JLWPGH, if you were in the SoCal area, I would most definitely ask you to coffee. 🙂 Your post made me laugh on what is a really un-funny Monday morning. You sound like a lot fun.

  2. You did Great. Next time bring Cigars, M&M’s,Scotch or Beer. Or, just yourself. You asked him out. He is the luckiest guy on the planet. You should send that guy poison ivy. Give me his # and I will go kick his ass. Then I will wait for you to call me. I would love to be asked out. But, one thing I learned in life. If I ask the girl out, she can say no and not explain why. The same should go for a gal. But, I would be you would be batten 7-800% if you ask. My # is.

  3. Maybe she overdid it with the flowers. I’m sure he told his buddies of it and got the p***y line from them or at least the inspiration to call.

    Otherwise he was a jerk.

  4. The guy sounds like he has some real insecurities that he has unleashed in the most vile way.

    I find it quite sad that he accepted her instigating the date, paying for it and even transporting him from it without mentioning he felt uncomfortable or at least out of his depth. I therefore find it incredibly difficult to understand how he could spit so much venom about it retrospectively and exercise such discourtesy to boot!

    Better left in the dustbin of history!

  5. What an ass. How often is it that a gal actually has enough interest in a guy to ask him out and treat him to a classy time? I’d be extraordinarily flattered that someone thought so highly of me that they’d be willing to go through all that.

    Machismo: Because me big angry man, and you tiny woman I must save. Grah.

    Be glad you’re rid of him.

  6. Sounds like she dodged a bullet with that jerk!

    More women should take that ask-first strategy just to weed out the obvious idiots like him…

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