Dear Em & Lo: The Lightning Round

photo by stevoarnold

Sometimes the questions we get asked don’t require a long complex essay to answer — to us, they seem pretty cut and dry. But a three-word advice post could read a little cold. And yet we hate to leave people hanging. So we’ve upped the word count by putting a few of these types of questions into one single post. Hope you likey!

What do I do if my boyfriend won’t use a condom & expects me to “trust” him?
You break up with him.

I’m a sophomore in college. I wanted to get your advice about how I know if I’m ready to lose my virginity.
We’re inclined to say “You’ll just know” but that’s a terrible answer. You’ll know you’re ready when you’ve found a guy you trust who you want to have sex with — not because you feel you’re old enough or because all your friends are doing it or because you just want to get it over with, but because you actually want to exchange physical naked pleasure with this person and that sober* impulse is driving you crazy. (But not crazy enough to consider doing it without procuring condoms first, and ideally a back up form of birth control.)
*Knowing college, any deep realizations you come to while shitfaced on The Beast (like “I should just lose my virginity here in one of the upstairs, dirty-laundry-strewn rooms of this beer-soaked frat house with the least drunk guy I can find”) should not be acted upon.

For the past ten years I had a great relationship with a guy friend. He was my mentor and we became extremely close. For the last 5 months he just has become so distant and unapproachable. He does have a  girlfriend and I know he does have another on the side. But why would he stop talking to me. This is nothing new — he has had others while we were friends.
We could take a guess, but we’re not going to because the possibilities are endless. The only way to know is to ask him point blank and hope he gives you an honest answer. (But why do you want to be friends with someone who cheats on his girlfriend anyway?)

hi could i have some picture of you em and lo fully naked and lauri fully naked so i can see the boobs and vagina thanks peter just email me a link.
Oh, you know, we totally would have but we’re sticklers for good grammar and punctuation, so in all good conscience we’re going to have to go ahead and deny your request at this time.

Em & Lo


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