Introducing Twitter Sex… Because Text Sex Is So 2008

iphone_lingeriephoto by coreforce

We have to admit, reading Violet Blue’s article on Twitter sex made us feel a little out of it. And, okay, a little old. We have a Twitter account because someone told us we should sign up, but we’ve never actually “Twittered” and we’re not sure we ever will. So we think it’s pretty safe to say that we will never, ever Twitter in bed. We’re still trying to get our heads around text sex…how could that possibly be fulfilling?! Don’t you need both thumbs to text?!

But apparently getting down and dirty via Twitter is what all the kids are doing these days. As far as we can tell, it works pretty much like text sex (yawn), except unlike with texting, it’s all too easy to accidentally have Twitter sex in public — meaning, you might accidentally cc all your friends on your intimate encounter. For those of you who actually understand Twitter-ese, this happens when you communicate “@” someone instead of directly to them. We just hope they’ve all got virus protection.

Of course, there are those people who broadcast their intimate encounters to all their friends on purpose via Twitter. And apparently it’s not just pornstars promoting their latest films who take it to the next level and update their Twitter accounts mid-coitus. Which we guess is the 2009 equivalent of answering the phone during sex — except that if you’re really discreet and really talented with your thumbs (or your toes?), you might actually be able to update your Twitter account without your partner knowing.

We suppose it was only a matter of time — after all, people already use Twitter and Facebook status updates to let you know about their latest bowel movement or ripped toenail. So why not their latest orgasm? Personally, we’d rather hear about good sources of fiber, but we’re old-fashioned like that. So tell us, how far have you gone, technologically speaking? Text sex? Twitter sex? T.M.I. Facebook or Twitter status updates? Mid-coital updating…?


  1. Ladies, you really should consider using your Twitter account. It’s a great way to meet new people, and to see how many people declare a Twitcrush on you!


  2. As the aforementioned lover, I concur: spinning erotic tales via text messages is an intense erotic pleasure. May I suggest a variation? Trading messages through comments on Em & Lo’s blog is powerfully erotic too. Blue eyes, you still can put me in a state of limbic shock like no one else.

  3. I can’t begin to tell you how incredibly arousing I find it when my lover sends erotic messages to me by text. We write erotic stories back and forth to each other when one of us is waiting at an airport. It does make airport time fly by!

  4. NOt really far….i don’t really get turned on with text sex…the fartest that i’ve gone was the whole “what are you wearing” and after that i just don’t reply back…..A HUGE TURN OFF!!!

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