Top 5 Love Lessons from The Bachelor Finale (Juan Pablo)
photo courtesy of ABC/Rick Rowell
- When your partner’s family tells you he’s rude, he makes his mama cry, he won’t stick around when things get hard, he’s not an easy guy, he’s self-centered, he’s a know-it-all, he’s simple, he watches TV all day, and there will be lots of fighting, dump him.
- When your partner’s dad is more affectionate, more complimentary, and quicker to say “I love you” than your partner, dump him.
- When someone says “I love you” don’t respond with “Thank you” or a high-pitched, mildly frightened “Woooh!”
- Don’t mention the possibility of having children together if you’re not serious about the relationship. And don’t mention a ring if you’re not going to use it — it’s not a god-damned dangling carrot!
- When someone uses the phrase “It is what it is” to describe their relationship with you, dump him. In fact, if someone you’re dating uses the phrase “It is what it is” to describe anything, dump him.
The moral of this season of “The Bachelor”? DON’T DATE JUAN PABLO!
Uh, yeah. Pretty spot on, ladies. He reminds me of the unevolved frat boys I dated in college. And Nikki looked humiliated, sitting tightly in the crook of his arm. It’s a matter of time before he pulls a jake pavelka and tosses the GPS out the window when they’re fighting and she tries to give him directions.