Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it (18 and older only for dream interpretations, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri:

I’m turning 30 this month. I’ve never had a “wet” dream until last night. I’ve always had erotic dreams where I’ve come very close to coming and then it’s frustratingly cut short because I wake up. Last night was the first time that I can remember having a full on orgasm then waking up. But here’s where it gets very interesting. I’ve had a recurring dream where our planet is being taken over by a hostile alien race and I’m usually stuck helplessly watching the events unfold. I was abducted by the person who gave me the orgasm and she was a FEMALE alien! (I know right?!) She looked human, but had green skin, was very attractive, but had male genitals.

Now, I’m happily married to my husband of 6 years and have two kids. I don’t drink or take any drugs, so of course found this to be very strange yet entertaining. My husband and I haven’t made love in a couple weeks, and I’m currently on the second day of my period. Last night I slept with a tampon in, which I normally don’t do, which may have triggered the orgasm, but why the female alien abductor? Thoroughly confused…

Lauri:  It’s very natural and common for a woman to achieve orgasm in the dream state, more so than for a man after the early twenties. When you don’t achieve orgasm it could be due to external factors waking you up such as a dog barking outside, your bed partner snoring, etc. But if this is a constant with you, which it seems to be until recently, then it may be a psychological factor.

While the physical body reacts to a sex dream as if it were a real event, the cause of the sex dream is usually because you are working on incorporating some new element into your psyche in real life, such as a new behavior or a new attitude, in which case not reaching orgasm in the dream would be connected to not completing your change or transition. That was a really long sentence, but I think you get the general idea.

Let’s see if that is the case with you, because I am betting your orgasm is not about the tampon, but you completing something in real life. The alien is a big clue as to what it is! Aliens in dreams often represent something in our life that we have not encountered before, a situation that seems “alien” to us. In your dreams, the aliens are taking over. Ask yourself what unfamiliar situation seems to be taking over YOUR personal world. That hot, sexy alien that abducted you is an indication that you are succumbing to this “take over” of your world and are beginning to be okay with it… perhaps even starting to enjoy it.

Now, believe it or not, her male genitals are actually YOUR male genitals, psychologically speaking. This tells us that you have recently “grown a pair” and are beginning to be more assertive in this “new world” you have found yourself in. I think that may be why you orgasmed, because in “manning up” in real life, you were able to better handle what feels like “foreign territory” lately, rather than just watching things unfold, as you did in your previous dreams.

While an orgasm is the byproduct of a really steamy sex dream, it also serves as a psychological reward for a job well done in waking life. And since you are now past your twenties, I wouldn’t be surprised if you start having REM orgasms more often… lucky you!

Dreamer’s response: Awesome interpretation! It really helped me think critically about it and not take it so literally. I am still a little confused as to why my dream lover was female. I’ve always considered myself to be pretty straight. I’ve had homosexual dreams in the past which leads me to think that maybe my preference isn’t so black and white. Or maybe it’s because gay marriage, gender equality/changes, (like Caitlyn Jenner) has been so prevalent in the media lately, and this is my way of trying to make sense of it as way of acceptance. The part about me “manning up” to accept these changes is interesting and refreshing! Thank you for taking the time to interpret my dream.

Visit Lauri’s site, WhatYourDreamMeans.com, for even more dream interpretations! If you want to be able to figure out your own dreams each morning, check out her latest book, Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, which will give you the tools you need to become a dream expert. You can see all of Lauri’s books here. And hey, if you want your very own pin-up painting of you or your luvva (either vintage or modern), Lauri can do that, too!