When Is It OK for a Woman to Fart in a Relationship?

Advice from three of our guy friends. This week they answer the following: When is it okay for a woman to fart in front of her partner?

colin_adamo_100Straight Single Guy (Colin Adamo): Your five-year wedding anniversary. Some rather liberal couples will try to tell you they really don’t care about their partner’s farts (don’t believe them, they are crazy — stop inviting them to your dinner parties). I know you want to share everything with your loved one, but some boundaries exist for everyone’s benefit. This could be the secret barometer for a good relationship. The longer you can go without ever farting in front of your partner, the better your relationship will be. Your five-year is a fine capitulation-point because the two of you have probably hit your stride by now. But be careful, once this door opens, it can never be closed again.

terence_100Gay Committed Guy (Terence): When I was little I was told that holding in farts causes cancer, or loose bowels, when you’re old. So for the sake of your happy retirement, do both of you a favor and let ’em rip.

anonymous_suitStraight Married Guy (Matt): This is a tough one. I’d say after the first “I love you.” You’re safe after that. I know, it’s terrible to have to pretend until then, but some of us guys are under the (completely mistaken) impression that you ladies don’t fart as often or as terribly as we do, and I think in this case a little bit of a facade is a good thing. I’d still hope that after the facade falls there’s at least some difference between your farting habits and ours — but I guess I’m just old-fashioned that way.

Our “guys” are a rotating group of contributors. To ask the guys your own question, click here.