Wise Guys: What’s the Best Relationship Advice You Ever Got?

Advice from three of EMandLO.com’s guy friends. This week they answer the following: “What’s the best advice you’ve ever been given about relationships?” To ask the guys your own question, click here.

Single Straight Guy (Scott Phrenetik): “Make sure she’s happy.” Every woman is different and there are a myriad of ways to accomplish this, but by far the best relationship advice I’ve been given.



Married Straight Guy (Ben D.): Best advice I’ve been given is, would you set your sister or cousin up with someone like you? If the answer is no, then why would anyone else want to date you?



Single Gay Guy (Abraham Zeus Zapata): “Expectations lead to resentments, and when you allow people to just be themselves, the relationship can really grow.” RuPaul said that.



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Our “wise guys” are a rotating group of contributors, some of whom wish to remain anonymous and some of whom like the attention. This week’s Single Gay Guy is Abraham Zeus Zapata, an actor, writer and artist living in the Houston area; our Single Straight Guy is Scott Phrenetik, who moonlights as a DJ in Dallas; and our Married Straight Guy is Ben D., a former professional fighter who would now much rather spend time with his wife and baby son than get punched in the face by a sweaty man. To ask the guys your own question, click here.


  1. im a woman and if thier not happy im not happy put myself in others shoes not matter wat even if they do me wrong ima do them right especialy if they were there for you when no one else was=]

  2. I don’t know about the women you know… but the women I’ve known (and I’m including myself), if you make them happy, they want to make you happy in return. It’s a win/win situation.

  3. ^ So, basically, make your lady happy through submission and supplication, and maybe she’ll let you be happy too? I dunno man…

  4. It’s a toss-up:

    a) happy wife, happy life;

    b) Rule #1, you’re wrong; Rule #2, you’re wrong.

  5. In placing your heart in the care of your partner, you have each shown a tremendous amount of courage, perhaps more courage than can be appreciated in a single moment.

    Cultivate seeing each other in that light.

    You have given each other a delicate and precious gift that is at the same time is nothing less than awesome in its power.

    Strive always in both word and deed to be kind to each other.

  6. Thanks a bunch for your second comment Johnny!I’m putting that some place where I’ll always see it

  7. Yeah, not to ensure her personal happiness, but in regards to the relationship. Meaning love her, be honest, communicate, make her laugh, and so on. That creates a healthy and fulfilling relationship. Just like you said… you can’t fix an unhappy person. They have to do that themselves.

  8. I’m not sur how to read Scott’s advice.

    If he means, “make sure she’s a happy person before you get involved with her,” then that’s outstanding advice. But if he means, “take it upon yourself to ensure her happiness,” then that’s awful advice.

    Make yourself happy first, then find someone else who’s also happy, and be happy together. But don’t try to cheer up a Debbie Downer. That’s a lost cause. It’s what I call the theory of emotional gravity: you can try to pull someone up to your level, but you’ll more likely get dragged down to theirs. The downer has emotional gravity on their side.

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