My New Boyfriend Has a Small Penis…At Least, It’s Small to Me

Dear Em & Lo,

About six months ago I broke up with my boyfriend of 18 months and have recently met someone new. The other day the new boy and I were engaging in some hands-on action which led me to discover that he nowhere near measured up to my ex. The new boy was around 4-6″. My problem is that I’m really worried about having sex with him because my ex was over 8″. I feel really disappointed and I know that 8″ is a high bar that’s been set. Am I bad person or should I go looking for something more? Why can’t good-looking men come with the measurements of their penis tattooed onto their wrist or something? The problems and surprises that would solve.


Dear Sizeist,

We almost didn’t print your letter because of the emotional damage it might inflict on insecure men everywhere. It’s the secret fear that everyone — male and female — experiences at some point in their hook-up life: Am I being compared to their ex(es)? And if so, am I failing to measure up?

But on behalf of all the average-sized men out there, i.e. the vast majority of men, we think you should give Mr. 4-6″ a chance. It’s not like you’ve dated a string of 8″ men and have discovered that only a super-sized schlong can satisfy you. (In fact, you need to understand that, statistically speaking, 8 inches is freakishly long). No, you just had one great experience with one 8″ penis. And this is by no means a guarantee that sex with a 4-6″ penis will feel only 50-75% as great.

For a start, men with big swinging dicks can get lazy in the sack, assuming that size is the only thing that matters. They may also assume that intercourse is the only thing that matters — and we all know how few women climax from intercourse alone; remember, orgasm achieved through non-penile means still counts as sex! Not to mention, you may suddenly discover new penetration positions that you really enjoy — positions that perhaps were not so comfortable with a larger specimen. Oh, and don’t forget that, when it comes to size, most women agree that girth is a lot more important than length, since the majority of sensation is felt in the outer third of the vagina, thanks to the extensions of the clitoris, the g-spot, and the pelvic floor muscles around the lower part of the vaginal canal (and also since a lot of women don’t enjoy having their cervix rammed).

On a final note: Maybe he was nervous and not fully inflated, as it were. Basically, you have no idea what sex is going to be like with this man. So if you dig him (and we surely hope the handwork you exchanged means that you do), why not find out whether the motion of his ocean can get the job done?

Of course, we can’t discount the fact that you may simply be less attracted to him (or not attracted to him at all) now that you’ve scoped out his unit — you like what you like.  This doesn’t make you a bad person, though you are severely limiting your dating options — at least until your tattoo idea catches on. We suppose you could post a personal ad specifying that only 8″-penis-owners need reply, but something tells us that’s not exactly the way to find the next Boyfriend of the Year. Here’s a better idea: Why not just spend some quality time with an average-sized penis and see if the experience converts you?

Here for the little people,

Em & Lo

Do you worry about the size of your package?
“15 Ways to Make the Most of Your Small Penis in Bed”

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1128 Comments on "My New Boyfriend Has a Small Penis…At Least, It’s Small to Me"

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The boss man

Turn it into a good thing. Lock him up in a nice steel cock cage and keep his keys. Make him your cuckold you will love it once you tried it. Many couples these days are doing it that way. They say its also a nice game to play for a lady that likes it big.


I had to share this video link. Carefully listen to this man. He’s very inspiring and you can see that life is very much about making a choice. Choosing what to believe, what to think, what to be. Now applying what he’s talking about to “this” topic…just think how dwelling on having a small penis is holding you back from a rich and fulfilling life! What a total waste of time.


A “down” vote? Must be a pathetic sad sack that likes to wallow in self pity. 😉


Well…I contacted an expert on penis size….the legendary porn actress Seka! Yes I’m telling the truth, I emailed her and asked her about penis size and what did she think.
Here is her response:
“I have found that “average” is quite nice. I was never a size queen. If you know what you are doing as a lover it shouldn’t matter.”

So there you have it. From a woman who’s had the biggest cocks in porn, including the legendary John Holmes. Now to be clear….In my email to Seka I defined average as 5 1/2″ to 6 1/2″.


Hmmm….voted down….well I know who that was! LOL Pretty sure he said he was never going to read any more of my comments. 😉


Em and Lo…..Did you ever follow up with “Sizest” to find out if she ever sex with her new boyfriend? I think the follow up would be interesting to read and to know how things worked out.


One man’s courageous journey to come to terms with his small penis:

A very well done documentary. It’s very enlightening and entertaining. You can see how much men obsess over their cocks, and you can also see that many, many women don’t really put much thought into them.

This comment that I came across on the internet (a comment that came directly from watching the documentary I posted), it a perfect example of how an insecure man views women. The reply to this man’s comment is a great example of what MOST women want in a man and the true reason why insecure men are dateless (it’s not due to their small dick, it’s due their insecurities and female issues that cause the women to ignore them. Here’s the guy’s comment: Basically the women participating in this documentary are telling it like it is. And men probably shouldn’t… Read more »

It seems some guy’s are just so freaked out by their small cocks that they have become almost non functional. I wonder if embracing your small size might be the answer….perhaps turn it into a fetish.
SPH stands for “small penis humiliation” and many men experience great sexual pleasure from it. And there seems to be women who enjoy this type of lifestyle/fetish. Instead of being paralyzed by your small penis, learn to seek pleasure in being shamed. You might not find it ideal….but face facts, no woman is going to worship your tiny dick.

This is an entertaining website. http://www.thevisualiser.net You can enter your cock size and compare it visually to other cocks. I compared my 6.5″ cock to a 3.5″ cock and I look like a porn star in comparison! Of course when I compare it to a 9″ cock it’s pretty humbling! When you see the size of a 9″ cock you can see how many women would find something that big painful. There is a wide range of dicks you can compare to….some based on real life porn stars, and those based upon statistical averages. I think for the majority of… Read more »