Em & Lo's RSS Feed Em & Lo's Daily Email Feed Be Our Facebook Friend! Follow Us on Twitter!

Halloween on Amazon

Buy on Amazon Kindle!

Good Vibes Bat Crop

LEVI's on Amazon


Archive | Wise Guys RSS feed for this section

What Straight Guys Really Think About Backdoor Play

October 28, 2014

0 Comments

Advice from three of our guy friends. This week they answer the following: Do most straight guys secretly want to have their bums explored by their girlfriends/wives? Like, even if they don’t admit it, and they’d never ask…deep down, are they curious?

Straight Single Guy (L.A. Chris): When they’re together, straight guys tend to avoid anything that could sound even remotely homosexual. Not even a metro guy will tell his buddies how much he enjoyed the ass-play he got last night. This makes it hard to gauge how many butt-buffs there really are out there, but for me I can easily say no. No curiosity, no secret enjoyment. I’m probably in the minority here, but to me it’s sort of like a stray finger up the nose while making out: not terrible, but not particularly exciting either — just off-target.

Straight Married Guy (Jamie):
I really think this has to do with the guy’s own level of homophobia.  If the guy is open-minded and comfortable in his masculinity, then it’s just something else to try in the bedroom.  However, I personally know a few guys who are otherwise pretty sexually adventurous, but who feel that any attempted ass play from their partners is a deal-breaker.  Of course, these are the same guys who still think it’s funny to make “fag” jokes about each other in public.  I think, for guys like this, asking for some anal attention would be too big of a threat to their warped sense of masculinity.

Gay Engaged Guy (Joel Derfner, author of Swish): Let’s face it: The prostate is the prostate.  Your nerve endings don’t care whether you like to have sex with boys or girls; when something feels good, it feels good.  It’s possible that even ten years ago I would have answered differently, but twenty-first century porn has changed my mind: Porn sites where supposedly straight men have sex with other men are wildly successful. And I do think that at least some of these porn actors are straight, or at least straighter than they are gay. So this makes me think that there has to be something intriguing enough to them about the idea to overcome what’s left of the taboo. And this is with other men! So if very experimental straight men are willing to let other men explore their bums, then yes, I suspect that your average straight man is definitely interested in having his female partner explore his bum — even if he won’t admit it.

MORE LIKE THIS ON EMandLO.com

Our “wise guys” are a rotating group of contributors, some of whom wish to remain anonymous and some of whom like the attention. This week’s Gay Engaged Guy is Joel Derfner, author of SwishTo ask the guys your own question, click here.



What It Means When a Man Won’t Cuddle or Hold Hands

October 21, 2014

0 Comments

photo via flickr

Advice from three of our guy friends. This week they answer the following: “If the guy I’ve started dating recently isn’t into cuddling or hand-holding, is that automatically a sign that he’s just not that into me, or are some guys just not into private or public displays of affection, no matter whether they’re in love or not?”

Straight Married Guy (Fred): I’ve heard that some men just aren’t into displaying affection.  That’s lame and I think they are idiots. But I suspect there really aren’t that many of them.  If a guy doesn’t want to cuddle he probably doesn’t want you to feel like he’s your boyfriend.  He doesn’t want you to get too close, too fast.  Similarly, he could argue that he doesn’t want to lead you on.  Hand-holding for many guys is reserved for monogamous relationships.  It is a public signal that he is taken.  But, I also suspect that if Jennifer Lawrence or Scarlett Johansson wanted to hold his hand he’d be very willing and happy to display to the world “I’m doing her!”  So… he’s not that into you.  But he may only need more time to get where you are.

Gay Married Guy (Jon): Me, I’m a touchy-feely kind of guy. If I’m digging someone, I let them know it, physically, in as many ways as possible.  After some good, or even mediocre sex, there’s nothing better than a nice cuddle to cap off the experience. However, my hubby isn’t so lovey-dovey. He gets hot very quickly and basically endures it for my sake for as long as he can, which usually amounts to about 45 seconds. It used to bother me, but I’ve realized it’s just a quirk of his and really has no bearing on how he feels about me. So I wouldn’t read too much into it if your man isn’t a cuddle bug or or happy hand holder. Ask him, or just give him some time. There are dozens of reasons why he may be just not that into it, but it doesn’t necessarily mean he’s not into you.

Straight Single Guy (Chris): It is entirely possible that your guy is not ever going to show affection for you in public no matter how much he thinks he likes you. Unfortunately, though, this is more often the conscious or unconscious manifestation of him just not being that into you. So you have to look for other signs. Give it some time and try hard not to confuse love with lust. New relationships are often mostly lust disguised as love. Sometimes love follows, and sometimes it doesn’t, but you should give it a chance. If he treats you fantastically all the time and simply isn’t holding your hand or kissing you in public, it may be genuine shyness. But if the public displays of affection are just one more thing in the list of affectionate things he isn’t doing, then it may be time to look elsewhere… That is, unless the sex is fantastic.

MORE LIKE THIS ON EMandLO.com:

Our “guys” are a rotating group of contributors, some of whom wish to remain anonymous and some of whom like the attention. This week’s Straight Single Guy is Chris DiClerico, and our Gay Married Guy is Jon Ross. To ask the guys your own question, click here.



Why Guys Are So Obsessed with the Twin Thing

October 14, 2014

3 Comments

Advice from three of our guy friends. This week they answer the following: What’s the deal with fantasizing about twins? (Coors Lite twins, Hef’s twins, etc.) How come the whole implied incest thing — a.k.a. “Twincest,” thanks, Gone Girl! — isn’t a turn-off?

Straight Single Guy (Colin): I think, for some men, having a set of twins is the American Dream. An international friend once told me that you can make anything American by just adding more. With this perceptive logic, a fantasy of one beautiful girl instantly becomes as epic as the untamed West, as landing on the moon, as the California Gold Rush, as soon as you add a second copy of the same girl. I think we all understand that most threesomes we fantasize about involve some enjoyable spectating of girl-on-girl, but when it comes to twins, the fantasy is strictly about us-on-them (or vice versa). They’re seeing each other naked, but I think we can all get over that if it means living the life our forefathers fought for. It’s a patriotic fantasy really.

Straight Married Guy (Matt): This isn’t a fantasy I ever really think about, but when it’s brought up — sure, hot twins sound great! And because it’s a fantasy, we don’t care about the implied incest, or the implied next-morning awkwardness or anything else other than the sex. I guess in this case I think less about the fact that they’re sisters as much as I’m thinking two identical hot girls catering to my every whim. What’s better than that? (Besides hot triplets, of course.) Read the rest of this entry »



What Men Really Think About Fake Boobs

October 7, 2014

3 Comments

Advice from three of our “Wise Guy” friends. This week a straight woman asks, “So what’s the deal with fake boobs — are straight guys into them or not? Does it make a difference whether they’re just looking (e.g. porn, strip club, Hollywood star) vs. touching (e.g. a hook-up)? And does it make a difference whether the hook-up is casual or relationship material?”

Gay Single Guy (Jay Dyckman): Here’s the thing about fake boobs. They work. It’s the same for gay guys. Just substitute silicone for steroids. I know plenty of guys who have gone from Plain Jane to Ripped Rita via syringe, and rollicked in all the dating perks that come with that.  It is lame, they look ridiculous, but it truly, truly works.  To be totally fair, though, the real equivalent would be penile implants, which are currently as effective as supergluing Play-doh around the member so it appears larger.  And let me tell you, if they ever perfect the art of penile enhancement, every guy you know will have an eleven-inch penis.  Let me repeat:  Every.  Guy.  You.  Know.  At that point, glance waist level in a locker room and it would look like something Tarzan used to traverse the jungle. Which is why it amazes — and inspires — me that every woman doesn’t have humungous breasts.  You are the stronger sex.  Like I said, if men were in that position, this would be a nation of Pamela Mandersons. (Oh, and indulge a gay guy:  Why are “A-cup” boobs small and “D-cup” boobs big?  Shouldn’t it be the reverse?  As in, “Look at those grade A boobs!  She’s stacked.”  And flat girls are in danger of socially failing with a “D”?  I mean, this is classic grading on a curve, right?)

Straight Single Guy (Tyler Barnett): As a guy in my twenties, I have basically grown up surrounded by breast implants, so they don’t tend to faze me. I can recall on more than one occasion pointing out a beautiful girl, and hearing an older guy say, “But she has fake boobs,” and I’m like, “So what?” To me, fake boobs usually look better than their natural counterpart (which is not to say I haven’t seen horrendous, overdone and very strange looking fake breasts). But admittedly, much like artificially flavored food, no matter how close to the original they get, the real thing always tastes better. Saline boobs tend to feel like water balloons, which can take away from the heat of the moment. I’ve felt silicone ones that were so close to the real thing it didn’t matter, but at the end of the day a soft real breast is as sexy as it gets — and I think most men would agree. Besides, bigger isn’t always better. While I appreciate a large set of melons as much as the next guy, I also think small breasts can be very sexy. Another concern is if my future wife could breastfeed. (Didn’t China just recall baby formula because it contained Melamine? No thank you.) Ultimately, though, men love breasts — big, small, real, fake, we usually are just happy to see them, feel them, sleep on them. The decision to get implants should be the woman’s without any outside influence. Whatever you decide, like the bra you wear, we men will support you.

Straight Married Guy (Jim): There’s definitely a difference between looking and touching. The only time I’ve ever (knowingly) handled fake breasts, they felt like the knees of a Shaq-sized newborn: velvety-soft but concealing a hard, round mass.  (That means they were cheap, right?)  I have never heard my straight male friends say anything negative about the sight of fake boobs (or about the individual woman for having a surgically enhanced bust, for that matter), but displeasure has been expressed with the feel of stony fakes.  Most men wouldn’t avoid a hook-up based on bust fakery, unless they’re reading into your personality through your bra.  It’s still a hook-up, right?  But as with anything else in the bedroom that can’t be changed through intimacy and patience alone, if it’s a turnoff for this theoretical guy, it might sink the relationship.

MORE LIKE THIS ON EMandLO.com:

Our “wise guys” are a rotating group of contributors, some of whom wish to remain anonymous and some of whom like the attention. This week’s Straight Married Guy is Jim from New York, our Gay Guy is Jay Dyckman, an LA copywriter, and our Single Straight Guy is Tyler Barnett, owner of the LA PR firm Barnett Ellman. To ask the guys your own question, click here.



What Guys Really Think When a Woman Has Sex on the First Date

September 23, 2014

4 Comments

Advice from three of our guy friends. This week they answer the following: “Does sleeping with a guy on a first date really ruin my chances for a future relationship with him? What if it’s obvious we really like each other, the chemistry’s great, we have a lot in common, and we’re both horny?”

Straight Married Guy (Figleaf): I don’t think first-date sex together ruins your chances but it does change them.  You know the critical little “voice in your ear” that says, “Hold off: good girls shouldn’t ruin their ‘reputations,’” even when you’d rather not wait?  Men get that too.  Only ours says “Go for it now: losers never get another chance.” Neither “voice” is telling the truth but they can have an effect anyway.  Sometimes when we have sex right away the social pressure those “voices” represent get in the way of everything else we might feel about each other. So for both men and women I think it’s worth it to wait at least for the rest of your feelings catch up. And since when did horny have a shelf-life anyway?  Even waiting a few days (three days, not three dates) gives you both time to talk, a chance to take showers and sleep on it in your own beds, a time to decide what you really want instead of what you think you should do, and… time to get your respective bedrooms tidy and kitchens stocked for intimate guests.

Gay Single Guy (Daniel): Thinking that putting out on the first date will kill off any romantic possibilities is pandering to an old skool way of thinking about sex and love: that the guy must court, wait a gazillion years while the woman’s heart oh so steadily burns and yearns and he tries to satisfy himself on a nightly basis, Onan-style, until they are finally wedded before sex can even be in the equation. In the 21st century, sex on the first date could very well just mean that you “have a lot in common and were both horny.” Sex doesn’t always complicate, nor is it always a barrier to further emotional intimacy. On the contrary, in fact. Consider all the gay couples around the world who meet each other on a sex date/Internet hook-up/anonymous sex excursion, find that there are other things they like about each other and end up happily part of a pair years later. What really ruins future relationships is being dishonest about your needs and desires. So fuck on the first date if you like! Any guy who would dismiss you for it despite having such a great connection otherwise is too much of a fool to keep on seeing anyway.

Straight Single Guy (Mark): I don’t think there are too many absolutes in this crazy game of love, so a first-date romp doesn’t necessarily preclude any future relationship potential. What is a universal absolute regarding potential relationships is that communication is key (trite as it sounds, it’s so true). Let’s say you and your date are lucky enough to totally “connect” in all the ways mentioned above, and are also comfortable enough to acknowledge to each other how much you are on the same page, even about getting physical right away (and of course, as Em & Lo have taught us, keeping in mind, and also communicating about, all the relevant important safety issues involved!). Well, in a way, you already have some fantastic “They were inseparable (figuratively in this case, heh) from the moment they met!” romantic potential built right in!  So why, then, does the fun have to stop at the bedroom doorway? Now, as we know, it’s not always such an ideal world, with perfect communication right off the bat, so exercising a modicum of restraint (and building up anticipation for the fun after a subsequent date soon to follow) isn’t the worst thing in the world, either. So go with the flow.

MORE LIKE THIS ON EMandLO.com:

Our “guys” are a rotating group of contributors, some of whom wish to remain anonymous and some of whom like the attention. This week’s Gay Guy is one-time stripper and sex columnist Daniel; our Straight Married Guy is Figleaf, the guy behind RealAdultSex.com; and our Straight Single Guy is Mark Luczak, a tech god at Carnegie Mellon University (he was single when we first asked him this question, but he is now married!). To ask the guys your own question, click here.



How to Convince Two (Straight) Guys to Have a Threeway

September 16, 2014

3 Comments

Advice from three of our guy friends. This week a straight woman asks, “How can I can convince two hetero dudes to have a threeway with me?”

Straight Married Guy (Ben): What you really need to do is figure out if the MMF threeway is a “Yes,” a “No,” or a “Maybe” for these guys. Yes? No problem — go for it. No? it’s never going to happen – stop wasting your time. Maybe? Well, then it’s negotiable. And, while it’s easiest just to come out and ask, you can also test the waters by sharing “a sexy dream you had,” or confessing a fantasy after a few drinks. Truth or Dare can be a good gateway game to finding out who’s a “Maybe.”

The “Maybes” are the ones that need convincing, and what that really means is setting some ground rules. Maybe it’s no guy/guy touching. Maybe it’s lots of touching but no kissing. Maybe it’s only one cock visible at a time. Whatever. If it’s a “Maybe” for your guy, the question becomes, “What do you need to make this threesome happen?” And that is a question that can be answered.

Straight Single Guy (Max): Barring the possibility that you could trick these “hetero” dudes into your lair (using beer, snacks or Ahnold movies) I’d say that your best bet is to try and wiggle your way into the arms of two friends or, even better, the bromance. Face it: a lot of guys go by the super homophobic rule of “as long as the balls don’t touch,” so you’re much better off finding two guys that are as comfortable with one another’s body as they are with their joint egos. After that, your best policy is honesty. You can’t be coy about getting two guys at the same time, so I’d say be up front: “If you boys want me, you’re going to have to share. I’ll be in that room. Come find me?” Oh, and please end any threeway with a lot of high fives. They’re free, and you deserve it.

Gay Committed Guy (Mark):

1. Get them drunk.
2. If that doesn’t work, you’re on your own. And when you find out, let me know.
3. “Dudes”?

MORE LIKE THIS ON EMandLO.com:

Our “wise guys” are a rotating group of contributors. This week’s Straight Married Guy is Ben, a writer and artist living in Los Angeles. Our Committed Gay Guy, Mark, is a writer and teacher in NYC, and our Single Straight Guy, Max, is a recent college grad in New England. To ask the guys your own question, click here.



Do Guys Really Care If Their Girlfriend Has a Higher Body Count?

September 9, 2014

3 Comments


photo via flickr

Advice from three of our guy friends. This week they answer the following: Does the average hetero guy really care if his girlfriend/wife has had sex with more people than he has? And if so, why?

Straight Married Guy (Jamie): I may be somewhat in the minority here in that, while I have an extremely liberal philosophy about sex, I haven’t had a particularly high number of sexual partners (I was always a “girlfriend guy” and just didn’t rack up the big numbers).  I’ve also never bought into the whole men-as-players/women-as-sluts double standard.  Many of the female friends I admire most have had lots of sexual partners, but are also all well-adjusted, independent women.  To be honest, I’ve always been more attracted to women who have an air of worldliness.  I think it’s a turn-on to be with a woman who is confident sexually and knows what she likes.  And if that confidence came at the hands (or whatever) of more former lovers then I’ve had, well that’s just fine by me.

Gay Engaged Guy (Joel Derfner, author of Swish): As a gay man living in a major metropolitan city, I’ve lost track of the amount of sex I’ve had.  How then can I hold a partner to a different standard?  I recommend that everybody have enough sex so that both the boy and the girl can honestly say, “I’m not really sure,” and leave it at that.  That said, I asked my straight cousin, whose wife has always been very sexually free, and he said that his biggest worry had been that their kids’ attitude toward sex would develop far too early as a result, but this has turned out not to be the case.  I loathe children, so I’m going to stick with the “I’m not really sure” recommendation.

Straight Single Guy (L.A. Chris): Totally. He also cares if she’s stronger, smarter, or wealthier than he is. It comes down to our primal need for dominance. Unless a guy’s got a fetish or extreme dominance in one of those areas (i.e., a body-builder won’t care about a girl’s bulging biceps), it’s a turn-off to be second banana or subordinate. Truth be told, he’ll also feel a little bit jealous (it’s a big competition between guys since we were teenagers). And lastly, we want our girl to be a virgin slut, and we need to pretend that if we’re not the first, then at least we’re the best.

MORE LIKE THIS ON EMandLO.com

Our “wise guys” are a rotating group of contributors, some of whom wish to remain anonymous and some of whom like the attention. This week’s Gay Engaged Guy is Joel Derfner, author of SwishTo ask the guys your own question, click here.



Why You Should Lie When He Asks About His Penis Size

August 26, 2014

3 Comments

Advice from three of our guy friends. This week they answer the following: If a guy asks me how I think his penis ranks size-wise, and I honestly think it’s a little on the small side or perhaps too skinny, what do you think the best approach is?

Straight Married Guy (Fred): I’ll start answering this question with another question:  If I honestly think a woman is on the big side or perhaps a little chubby and she asks me if she’s fat, what do you think the best approach is? Of course I tell her that she looks great. But there’s a difference between these two situations: she can eat a healthier diet and exercise but he can’t do anything about his size. She may even be looking for a little motivation with the question, but it’s still polite to fib in this instance. Which means it’s imperative to fib in the other instance. Tell him that you think his size is great. You can add that you’ve seen bigger and, more importantly, you’ve seen smaller, and that he’s just right.  Adding that too big can be uncomfortable is always a good tidbit as well.  Being honest in this case will only serve to make him forever self-conscious or even more self-conscious than he already is (men hear all the time that “It’s not the size of the boat but the motion of the ocean,” but men also see the widening eyes and devilish smiles when women talk about sizable, girthy man-sausage). A finessed answer can give him the confidence that most women find attractive and will more than make up for his tiny dick.

Straight Single Guy (Chris): This is an easy one: Lie. If you tell the truth (“It’s kind of too skinny…”) his penis may never again work for you, ever. Put yourself in his shoes, “Are my boobs big enough for you? You seem to always look at girls with big boobs when they walk by…” Would you really want him to say “Well, honey, your boobs are cute, but they are much smaller than I prefer. If I could use magic to change you, I would give you natural 34DD’s.” So lie. But before you do, you need to know is that if his penis is small-ish, he already knows. He is already sensitive about it, and he is just hoping you haven’t been with any well-endowed men. So if you overcompensate with an outright fabrication such as, “It’s huge. It’s the biggest one I’ve ever seen,” he will know you are lying to spare his feelings and he will feel even worse. So just say, “Honestly, it’s not the biggest one I’ve ever seen, but it works great for me and you are fantastic in bed. Let’s do it right now!” Trust me, this is the only answer that can work.
Read the rest of this entry »



Why He Didn’t Call or Text When He Said He Would

August 19, 2014

0 Comments

Advice from three of our guy friends. This week they answer the following: Why didn’t he call  (or text/email/Gchat/et al) when he said he would?

Straight Married Guy (Matt): There’s a simple answer to this one: it doesn’t matter. Most women I know get very worked up over this, and it never helps anything. It could be one of ten thousand possible reasons, and there is no chance that sitting and discussing it with your friends ad infinitum or stressing about it is going to help anything. It might just be some reason that has nothing to do with you (family problem, work problem, some other unrelated problem), or hey, maybe he likes you and he scared off the last woman he liked, so he’s forcing himself to pull back a little — or maybe your worst fear is true, and he isn’t actually into you.

You won’t figure any of this out by sitting there and worrying about it or analyzing every tidbit of your last conversation or email exchange looking for clues, so what’s the point? My advice is to do everything possible not to obsess over the guy’s delay in calling. Distract yourself with whatever you can, even a date or flirtation with someone else if that’s what it takes. And if he never calls back, fuck him. At least you can feel good about not having wasted all that time sitting by your phone.

Straight Single Guy (Colin): Let’s be optimistic for a moment. Maybe he was debating how long he should wait to call so that he wouldn’t seem desperate. But now he’s waited too long and feels silly calling so long after the fact. Okay now let’s be realistic. Most likely this guy fell into the trap we all do sometimes, saying what we think we should say instead of what we actually think. Maybe the sparks weren’t there and he didn’t have the heart to tell you. Try to get in touch with him if you can. But if he’s still flakey, give him a quick kick to the curb and move on.

Gay Committed Guy (Terence): While tempted to say, “He’s just not that…” I think not calling is more likely because the alcohol has worn off and/or another woman is already on the side. When a guy wants to get laid, and let’s face it, if he’s asking for your number, then he’s that kind of into you, the first question running through his head after getting your number is why didn’t we just go home then? Calling sets up a whole ‘nother time-consuming process that sometimes just doesn’t seem worth it.

Personally, I think not calling takes real balls — not the good ones. Either you’re an over-confident prick, or you’ve got a girlfriend. You’re over-confident thinking you can get someone better (easier), or you know you may get a little somethin’ started and then have to emergency bail out of the situation. Solution: always, always take his number even though it’s just as shitty to wait around for him to return your calls.

MORE LIKE THIS ON EMandLO.com:

Our “wise guys” are a rotating group of contributors, some of whom wish to remain anonymous and some of whom like the attention. This week they’re all a little shy.



Wise Guys: Do Men Ever Appreciate a Handjob?

August 12, 2014

0 Comments


photo via flickr

Advice from four of our guy friends. This week they answer the following: I’ve heard that it’s not worth giving a guy a handjob because he can just do it better himself. Is that true?

Straight Married Guy (Jamie): Sadly, yes.  But I think the problem is just one of misconception on the part of most women.  In my opinion many women think, perhaps due to their lovers’ penchant for hard and fast intercourse, that a handjob needs to be a vigorous yank-a-thon.  Ladies, please, you’re not trying to inflate a bicycle tire here!  Despite popular opinion, the penis is a very sensitive organ.  And, with improper handling, and without lubrication, it can chafe.  The truth is, we’re just really good at it all by ourselves. Don’t get me wrong, we love it when you touch us and we appreciate the thought but, beyond a little foreplay grabby-grab, leave the heavy lifting to the professionals.

Straight Single Guy (Chris): The handjob is the single most underrated and underused sexual skill in the mix. I suppose it’s a self-fulfilling prophesy, that guys don’t like handjobs because they are generally bad, and girls don’t give them because guys don’t like them, so they never get any better at them. Well, I for one protest. A good, thorough, properly lubed, and sufficiently practiced handjob can be an amazing and deeply fulfilling sexual experience.

Let me be somewhat specific while trying not to be too crude. First of all, you have a range of options of position and technique, grip, pressure, lubricant, and speed. In my opinion, far more than with any other “technique.” You have significantly more control, drawing out the orgasm and the, how shall I put it, location of completion? All of the best blowjobs involve significant participation of the hands, so why would anyone believe the hands aren’t a good option on their own?

Please, please ignore the naysayers and their, “If I wanted a handjob, I’d give it to myself.” Practice, practice, practice, and cultivate this skill. Feel free to practice on me if you need to…

Just please consider the following:

1. Never, ever, ever do it dry, under any circumstances.

2. Consider aiming at yourself (anywhere, but some places are better than others) rather than at our belly buttons.

3. Try from behind and underneath. Trust me.

4. Control it. Bring it to the edge and back again. And again.

5. Don’t forget the surrounding area.

Straight Single Guy #2 (Joe): Absolutely, unequivocally, 100% NOT TRUE!  Any guy would much rather have a handjob from you than from himself. First of all, guys do it by themselves ALL the time, so having you do it makes it a special treat. Imagine running your fingers lightly over your own skin: it feels nice.  Now imagine someone you are attracted to doing it.  Much better, eh?  The physical act might be identical, but having someone else’s body heat / touch / scent / sounds / smile there and then not knowing exactly what they’re going to do adds so much more to it.

Gay Married Guy (Jon Ross): Nothing could be further from the truth, because there is nothing better than having someone do your work for you. While it’s true that guys can technically give themselves better handjobs than anyone else, it’s the thought — and effort — that counts. Gay guys don’t have a huge advantage over women here either: while having a dick does give you some insight into what works and what doesn’t, every guy is different and what blows my load may not get my man off. Personally I like a nice handjob to lead to a great blowjob, but if that’s not in the cards for whatever reason, a good handjob is wonderfully satisfying.

MORE LIKE THIS ON EMandLO.com:

Our “guys” are a rotating group of contributors, some of whom wish to remain anonymous and some of whom like the attention. This week’s Straight Married Guy is Jamie, a film editor in NY, our Straight Single Guy #1 is Chris DiClerico, and our Gay Married Guy is Jon Ross. To ask the guys your own question, click here.