Comment of the Week: When Tab A Doesn’t Fit into Slot B

Lily had this to say in response to the post “What Position Should Little Ol’ Me Use with My Big Boyfriend?“:

Sex can be extremely complicated, especially if you are a heady, nervous and insecure type (like me). I have yet to sleep with someone I am 100% comfortable around and assume it must have some negative psychological effects. If you’re tense and freaking out before and during, how can it not?

A lot of it is boundaries, knowing your own body, relaxation, etc. But sometimes penetration difficulties really are purely physical. I have sensitive mucous membranes and a ‘small vagina’ according to doctors,  but its all muscle related (no real physical abnormality). Extreme tightness can be due to vaginismus as well.

If you are super tight and he is super large then it may just be you are mismatched sexually.  Intercourse for me is usually a bitter sweet thing: kind of hurts, kind of feels great. So, at this point anyway, a guy with a massive penis is going to be a problem, not a great match. Not my fault nor his. I would just try to be honest and gentle…and rely on lube, fingers and oral.

Dating a giant?
Dr. Kate, Is My Boyf Too Big for Intercourse?