I Dreamt My Decent Ex Abused Me

Other people’s dreams are never interesting…except when they’re about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it (18 and older only for dream interpretations, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri:

Recently, I have reconnected with an ex-boyfriend. I am married, so we are not getting back together. We have been talking frequently and reminiscing a lot, however. Last night, I dreamed that we were meeting up to hang out. When I got there, we got in his car, and he refused to take me home. He proceeded to abuse me and say that he wasn’t taking me home. This was super weird and out of character. This wasn’t an abusive relationship, and he has never acted abusive or mean toward me. I’m really interested to hear an interpretation of this specific scenario.

LauriYou know how we all have that nagging little voice in the back of our head that says, “What exactly are you doing? You know better than this!” Well that nagging little voice, when we ignore it during the day, will come out and nag us even harder at night… in our dreams! That’s what seems to be happening with you.

You are in his car, which represents that he gets your motor going and vice versa. If he did in the past, he most likely still does. The car is also about things “moving forward.” Even online things can escalate quickly if you aren’t careful. But he refuses to take you home, which means that deep down you know that things could get to a point where you can’t go back to the way things used to be. This could apply to the way things used to be with him OR the way things used to be with your marriage… that is if you allow things to go too far.

The abuse is an interesting element to your dream.  Being abused or beat up in a dream is usually connected to the dreamer beating himself or herself up over something in real life. Is there a part of you that feels guilty about reconnecting with your ex? If so, that is likely the connection to the abuse. Remember, whatever is said to you or done to you in a dream is usually something you are metaphorically doing to yourself or are saying to yourself. Even if you feel you can be friends with your ex with no problem, it’s usually never a good idea if you are married. Your subconscious seems to feel the same way.

Visit Lauri’s site, WhatYourDreamMeans.com, for even more dream interpretations! If you want to be able to figure out your own dreams each morning, check out her latest book, Dream On It: Unlock Your Dreams Change Your Life, which will give you the tools you need to become a dream expert. You can see all of Lauri’s books here. And hey, if you want your very own pin-up painting of you or your luvva (either vintage or modern), Lauri can do that, too! 

What if your ex really was psycho?
And You Dreamt You Had Sex with Him!