Advice from three of our guy friends. This week a straight woman asks, “What do men in general think about dating older women, or cougars?”
Straight Married Guy (Jim): The cougar seems like a largely positive stereotype and I’m all for it. However, the importance of not dressing like you just chalked your first ID cannot be overstated. That makes me sad.
Straight Single Guy (Tyler Barnett): The cougar is a bit of an anomaly to me. On the one hand, cougars have experience, confidence and generally pleasing physical attributes, all of which are very attractive characteristics. On the flip side, they can be difficult to please and tend to try too hard. Personally, I find confidence attractive, but a truly attractive woman doesn’t have to try so hard to be sexy. So cougars aren’t generally my thing. But every now and again I’ll run into that mature woman who looks me in the eyes like she’s ready to pounce…and I hope she does. I think the trick to the sexy cougar is subtlety. If you can pull off a look 20 years below your age without appearing like it took you 20 years in the mirror to accomplish, you have mastered cougar purrfection. Grrr baby, very grrr.
Gay Single Guy (Jay Dyckman):
“I am Cougar, hear me roar,
In years too big to ignore…”
If it isn’t already, this should be the anthem for the beloved cougar. Prowl on, ladies! Honestly, what’s the big deal? OK, so maybe it is a sexual desire fueled largely out of a denial that one is rapidly aging off this mortal coil. We’re all headed there anyway, aren’t we? Why not grab a little nubile ass on the way out? The fact that, all these years later, we are still referring to older women as cougars, tells us that (1) we’re very attached to weird monikers for sexually-active women (see MILF); and (2) this country still has a problem with casual sex as it relates to women.
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Our “wise guys” are a rotating group of contributors, some of whom wish to remain anonymous and some of whom like the attention. This week’s Straight Married Guy is Jim from New York, our Gay Guy is Jay Dyckman, an LA copywriter, and our Single Straight Guy is Tyler Barnett, owner of the LA PR firm Barnett Ellman. To ask the guys your own question, click here.
When you’re young it’s a feather in your cap. Then when you’re older you want young women again.