Advice from three of our guy friends. This week they answer the following: “What is the general consensus on women with big labia, or longer inner labia, or dark labia? Does it really matter? With the rise in labiaplasty surgery and all the adult men’s mags only showing only “neat and tidy” vulvas, it’s hard to figure out if this is just some manufactured porn ideal or a vast preference among men…?”
Gay Single Guy (Daniel): If this is anything like the reference for cut versus uncut men (which would be the only way I could relate to this question, frankly), I’d have to say it’s probably just personal preference and if most of the men’s porn rags have neat and tidy, then that might just be the preference of the magazine editors. Big, dark, longer inner, whatever, it’s probably safe to say that a general consensus among men is CLEAN labia. After that, I’m sure it’s not a deal breaker.
Straight Single Guy (Mark Luczak): Cosmetically, a woman should feel completely comfortable with herself — confidence in oneself and one’s appearance is key. If you want to go to a dermatologist for help for vulvar and vaginal issues, that’s totally fine. There’s no shame in it and some women, especially those who have given birth, will feel more comfortable in bed if they get work done. I also understand women wanting to take any number of healthy avenues (diet, working out) toward as much visual improvement as one desires. At the end of the day, it’s totally up to personal preference.
As far as the male consensus, let me just say that if everything looked exactly the same, think how boring that would be. Those adult magazines simply don’t do justice to the great “variety” that is out there! Anyway, everyone being different in their own way is what makes us all special (not to go all Mr. Rogers). But seriously, if a guy is with someone he wants to be with for who she is as a complete person, how her labia look doesn’t really matter — he’s just thrilled to get to be intimate with her, and all her parts.
Straight Married Guy (James Glazebrook): I’m not a fan of plastic surgery, but I concede that not everyone is blessed with the same perfect proportions as me — that is, a big enough head to comfortably support some seriously outsized features.
So I understand why someone would get his or her nose done. After all, it’s out there for all to see, at all times. As for people whose face is the secret to their success, the pressure to have photogenic features has meant that movie stars stretching back to Marilyn Monroe have been getting their faces “fixed.”
The same is true for porn stars and their most valuable assets, their professional pussies. Either the big, long and dark labia are all being nipped and tucked, or they aren’t making it off the casting couch. But whether they’re being physically cut, or simply being cut in the editing suite, “imperfect” labia aren’t finding their way into pornography.
While this may be creating some impossible standards among men (and women) who can’t distinguish between fantasy and reality, for the rest of us it should be liberating. If your genitals aren’t frequently exposed to countless viewers, as long as they work, it doesn’t much matter what they look like. If you trust someone enough to let them down there, you should trust them not to put some alien porn ideal before your feelings or, more importantly, their chances of getting laid.
Our “guys” are a rotating group of contributors. This week’s Straight Married Guy is James Glazebrook of Most Likely To; our Gay Guy is one-time stripper and sex columnist Daniel; and our Straight Single Guy is Mark Luczak, a tech geek at Carnegie Mellon University. To ask the guys your own question, click here.
I’m really ashamed of mine and everytime my guy asks I just can’t bring myself to let him because it’s all dark and………. Well you can picture that.
Im mixed with southern Asian and white, but I kinda got my mom’s tan complexion. I’m really really scared he might be grossed out 🙁
Wow, Ferg’s response made me feel so much more confident. I’m Asian and have been pretty insecure about my labia since I’ve noticed from porn and media that pink labias were ideal, not the darker brown ones. I’ve never had a man go down on me before or seen me there even during sex, and I didn’t think they’d want to considering how ugly it looks. :/
Y’all haters crack me up. Envy is not attractive, but it sure is hilarious. To each their own, and I love my own.
I am still a little embarrassed with my large labia but I’m starting to embrace it. Everyone looks different down there, and I agree that I find oral sex to be much mkmore pleasurable and their tongue can sliding inbetween my large inner labia feels soo amazing. I can have multiple orgasms and guyz say it feels better during sex as it wrapps around their cock. 😉 Don’t hate on Dallas guys,
She’s just happier being simple!
……
she’s just
I used to be ashamed of my lips but my husband ‘who loves giving oral’ says I have the best he’s ever had. He also says my pussy hugs his cock like no other. Oh yea and fuck u Dallas…I bet you’re pussy has miles on it for days! Bahahaha usually us ‘tentacle’ women are so insecure we stay virgins into adulthood like myself which means more qaulity pussy =o
A pink paper cut slit is boring. Bring on the “tentacles”. The thicker, darker, meatier the better. Black, Asian and brunette women have the prettiest pussies on Earth.
My inner labia are small and pink, so much so that my pussy can “close” with nothing hanging out of it. I may be partial but these are the vaginas I find to be the prettiest, small and pink and dainty with a little clitoris. I am very proud of my pussy,and I love to take care of it and show it off. Men love to look at it and eat it; you don’t have to have big old tentacles hanging out of your labia majora to enjoy oral pleasure, that’s for damn sure! I wouldn’t dream on ever changing my pussy for anyone.
I have large labia and while it can be uncomfortable when I wear tight pants, I have to say its very pleasurable when I’m having sex. The nerve endings are very sensitive and I wouldn’t dream of snipping the soft petals off my ladyflower. What really.pisses me off is society’s concept of what women are supposed to look like and be. So our pleasure and well-being are secondary to what men want us to be?! Fuck that…also…@Ferg, I commend you for being honest and owning up to your past experience, your wife’s a lucky woman:) the world needs more open minded men And women.
Ok, I guess I should voice my opinion on this matter. As a boy I thought all labia were supposed to be small, pink, and hardly visible (thanks to playboy). As I became sexually active, I never paid em any attention. I finally was asked by one girl if I’d go down on her. I decide to try it, but she kinda smelled bad, so I didn’t do it. She had small, pink lips. It took years before I even thought to try that again! Then I met a gorgeous little Asian gal that loved oral above all else. She asked me to go down on her, which I decided to do, and I was completely freaked out by what I saw! She had these big, dark dangly things that looked like a roast beef sandwich! I couldn’t bring myself to kiss em, let alone lick em! I flat out told her they looked disgusting! She was pretty upset. She cried and told me she was very embarrassed about her pussy because it did look abnormal and freakish. I actually felt kinda bad! I decided I’d be “nice” and just try it to please her. I have to say it was the best damn roast beef sandwich I’ve ever eaten in my life! They felt so good between my lips and on my tongue! They were so stretchy and fun to play with! Before I knew it, she was cumming and I was hard as a rock! I kept going, and before I knew it I gave her 3 orgasms! After that she started sucking on me, but I just wanted to feel those meaty lips on wrapped around my penis. When she climbed on my lap and I slid inside her, I felt like I was getting laid and getting head at the same time! It was AMAZING! I’ve never found a more beautiful set of lips on a real woman, and I’ll never forget how awesome that experience was! My wife now has a nice thick, dark set, but they’re not nearly as large as I’d like em to be. I’ve almost thought about asking her if she would mind stretching them for me, but I’m not sure how she’d take that. LOL. Anyways, the short of it is: large, thick, dark = beautiful, tasty, amazing! Meat’s meat, and a man’s gotta eat! Be proud of your labia, ladies!
I love large lips. They really can’t be too big. My wife has very large outer labia and was a little shy about it when we got married. To me I love to feel the drag of the lips on my dick as I pull out. I also like some dark color. Anything different is sexy.
Well,I have large labia and I was hoping to get some assurance from all these men that have commented and I gotta say,I’m even more self concious. I feel as if I will end up alone because of it and I don’t want to have surgery. The only comment that has made me feel a little better was ” If a man loves you,he shouldn’t be put off why what your labia looks like. If he is,he’s obviously not worth your time.” On here it’s all about the ‘perfect’ porn star labias. Which I don’t have,unfortunately…
oh i wanna cry if i dont see any labia down there …well iam in africa but trust me women with big labia lips are far too sexy cause i love to play with them ,suck on them, tease them with ma pole etc i cant leave with out them i swear.
^This is just about the only time you’ll ever hear my say this, Brii, but play it conservatively with your sexuality for now.
You’re right about boys “spreading the word around school”, whatever that “word” may be. These are high school boys we’re talking about. They ABSOLUTELY WILL repeat whatever goes down (har har, no pun intended). If the guys you hook up with are jerks, they’ll tell everybody what you two did. If they’re nice guys, they’ll only tell their closest friends (who will then tell everybody what you did).
There is no such thing as discretion in high school. Every detail of your sexual encounter will become everyone’s business by third period.
If I sound anxious on your behalf, it’s because I was traumatized back in the day when the girl who deflowered me talked shit about my performance around the lunchroom table. Even the dorkiest virgins in school laughed at me. It was humiliating and scarred me for life.
Save it for college, that’s what I say.
Well, I’m a teen and I’v noticed that my Libias aren’t perfect. Their pink, and they are kind of long. It’s hard these days, knowing all my friends have been further then me. But honestly,I guess if a guy goes down there and doesn’t like it, it’s his problem.
It’s just hard to think that in the moment. He could spread the word around the school…
But whatever.
Wow…i have exes wanting me still and they could care less if my labia sticks out a lil…its like a lil touge saying ill tounge u first…hahaha