We get a lot of advice questions coming in at EMandLO.com, but sadly, we just can’t answer them all. Which is why, once a week, we turn to you to decide how best to advise a reader. Make your call on the letter below by leaving your advice in the comments section.
Dear Em & Lo,
Are the G-Spot orgasm and vaginal orgasm the same thing?
Assuming they’re different: I have an average penis size of 6 inches in lenth and 5 inches girth — am I able to give a woman a G-Spot or vaginal orgasm?
I have read about women saying only above average penises (8 inches mentioned the most) can reach certain spots in the vagina to produce these orgasms. I wouldn’t say I am insecure about myself or my size, but I would just like to know if this is true.
And let’s face it: Even if it is true, there isn’t much I can do to get to 8 inches anyway is there! I would just concentrate on trying to please through the clitoris instead.
— Average Joe
What advice or insight do you have to share with Average Joe about G-spot vs. vaginal orgasms and penis size? Leave your comments in the feedback section below.
Speech marks should I say haha xD
Thanks for your help everyone 🙂
I was just curious to see if there was a difference. I will give She Comes First a read.
@Nikki
Why did u put average in brackets :s haha
Read “She Comes First” by Ian Kerner. It will tell you everything you need to know about female orgasms.
Duly noted on the cervix issue – I was poking a little fun at myself. I’ve been jabbed in the cervix a few times, and each time it resulted in shutting the whole thing down. I am curious as to whether cervical stimulation itself has led to actual orgasm, as opposed to more enhanced pleasure.
And I didn’t say size was irrelevant – I said that in my experience, that’s the case for many women, but definitely not all.
Appreciate the correction. 🙂
@Nikki
While most women do not find cervical stimulation enjoyable, some actually do.
Some women like the sensation of being “filled” so the bigger the better until its too big (concept of diminishing returns).
While length might not impact g spot stimulation, girth certainly will. Though length might make certain positions more or less enjoyable.
Size isn’t completely irrelevant, and specific size preferences are going to vary among women, though like you said chemistry is probably the most important factor.
The G spot is responsible for the so-called “vaginal” orgasm. I reject the clitoral/vaginal orgasm distinction for a number of reasons(origins in Freud and the belief that one is superior to the other, the fact that the G spot is probably just the internal part of the clitoris, etc).
In any case, the G spot is not buried way deep in the vagina, so whoever is telling you you need an 8 inch penis to reach it is full of it. Indeed, trying to probe deep into a woman’s vagina is likely to lead to less pleasure not more, as you’re likely to come into contact with her cervix (this does not lead to orgasm, trust me).
All women are different, but the G spot is generally located somewhere along the front wall of the vagina, within the first couple of inches of the vaginal opening. You can often find it with your fingers using a “come here” motion. Since the G spot is literally within reach, your “average” size is more than sufficient to stimulate it. It’s just a matter of finding a position that works for you and your partner of the moment because, again, everyone is different.
Finally, here are a couple of other things you should note. First, the majority of women require some kind of external clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm. So regardless of your penis size, you’re going to have to give the little man in the boat some love if you want to get most of your partners off. Second, not all women enjoy G spot stimulation, so you’ll need to communicate with your partner about her specific preferences. Third, a man’s insecurity about his penis can be a huge turn off, so don’t sweat it. For many, I dare say most, women, penis size is irrelevant. What matters is chemistry, communication, and how attentive your partner is to your pleasure. If you’ve got these things down, you have nothing to worry about.