Advice from three of our guy friends. This week they answer the following: If a guy asks me how I think his penis ranks size-wise, and I honestly think it’s a little on the small side or perhaps too skinny, what do you think the best approach is?
Straight Married Guy (Fred): I’ll start answering this question with another question: If I honestly think a woman is on the big side or perhaps a little chubby and she asks me if she’s fat, what do you think the best approach is? Of course I tell her that she looks great. But there’s a difference between these two situations: she can eat a healthier diet and exercise but he can’t do anything about his size. She may even be looking for a little motivation with the question, but it’s still polite to fib in this instance. Which means it’s imperative to fib in the other instance. Tell him that you think his size is great. You can add that you’ve seen bigger and, more importantly, you’ve seen smaller, and that he’s just right. Adding that too big can be uncomfortable is always a good tidbit as well. Being honest in this case will only serve to make him forever self-conscious or even more self-conscious than he already is (men hear all the time that “It’s not the size of the boat but the motion of the ocean,” but men also see the widening eyes and devilish smiles when women talk about sizable, girthy man-sausage). A finessed answer can give him the confidence that most women find attractive and will more than make up for his tiny dick.
Straight Single Guy (Chris): This is an easy one: Lie. If you tell the truth (“It’s kind of too skinny…”) his penis may never again work for you, ever. Put yourself in his shoes, “Are my boobs big enough for you? You seem to always look at girls with big boobs when they walk by…” Would you really want him to say “Well, honey, your boobs are cute, but they are much smaller than I prefer. If I could use magic to change you, I would give you natural 34DD’s.” So lie. But before you do, you need to know is that if his penis is small-ish, he already knows. He is already sensitive about it, and he is just hoping you haven’t been with any well-endowed men. So if you overcompensate with an outright fabrication such as, “It’s huge. It’s the biggest one I’ve ever seen,” he will know you are lying to spare his feelings and he will feel even worse. So just say, “Honestly, it’s not the biggest one I’ve ever seen, but it works great for me and you are fantastic in bed. Let’s do it right now!” Trust me, this is the only answer that can work.
Gay Married Guy (Jon Ross): Oooh. Awkward. You might just want to end the relationship right then and there rather than suffer through such an uncomfortable conversation, especially if you can’t bluff. It is never advisable to tell a man his tool is anything but a first-rate, thick cut orgasm factory. If a man is asking you if you think he’s small, he’s probably having some self confidence issues, and confirming his suspicions will only exacerbate problems. So if you don’t mind living with his teeny-tiny skinny-minny member, lie through your teeth. Nothing good can come of you admitting you think he’s small. If the size of his prize has been an issue for you, or you’ve been looking for an excuse to break it off anyway, you might want to begin with “It’s not your small penis, it’s me. . .”
Our “guys” are a rotating group of contributors, some of whom wish to remain anonymous and some of whom like the attention. This week’s Straight Single Guy is Chris DiClerico, and our Gay Married Guy is Jon Ross. To ask the guys your own question, click here.
laugh*
You should tell him the truth, just try not to laugh.
I would try as much as possible to stay with a response that is both kind and honest. As a man, if my partner is trying to stick to those two principles I can deal with any answer a lot more easily.
I would also answer the question behind the question – am I a good and worthy lover/partner?
A man can’t change his penis size. He can certainly change how he approaches sex, and your relationship, with good communication. I would focus on that.
If she’s fat and ugly and asks me what I think of her, I tell her she’s fat and ugly and then if she still wants to fuck, I fuck her. And of course if she doesn’t want to fuck I just slap her on the arse and tell her to do as I told her – which is, down on all fours, arse in the air and piss flaps open.
If “she” tells me that she thinks my prick is too small etc I tell her I couldn’t really give a shit what she thinks because she’s a woman and women don’t tend to think much at all; they’re not very good at it.
I can’t really think of any situation why I would want to ask her what she thought in the first place and mainly due to the reason I gave above.
A little clue for every woman on the planet: Since there is little or nothing a man can do to change his penis size (besides lose some weight, which you DO have a right to expect, if he’s heavy and you’re in for the long haul), to complain about it, or admit that it’s not your druthers, is inherently cruel. Many women LOVE to disparage a guy’s size, because they know it strikes directly at his self-image, and it’s a terrific WMD (weapon of mind destruction). Using that weapon, though, demonstrates that you, yourself, are a callous hole.
Think about this, ladies: You’re inherently a deceptive lot, fully capable of lying to yourselves and convincing yourselves you’re right and justified if it suits your purposes. (Don’t bother denying what everyone reading knows to be true.) Use that to FIND A WAY to make your guy the best you ever had. Make it your own responsibility. Figure it the fuck out, rather than falling back on, “Hmm … he’s … hmm … not hung like a porn star, and Princess Me deserves a huge schlong.”
That’s easy! “I haven’t seen many penises.” And, I don’t care if you’ve seen hundreds!
4 inches was what he had. He knew he was tiny compared to many and wished he was bigger. All I could say was the honest truth: “If you were any bigger, I’d miss out on the greatest orgasms I’ve ever had.”
I know girls who say they like a big penis that really fills them up . I have also known girls who suffer such pain from the pounding on ovaries . Two ladyfriends of middling years have husbands with really large cocks , they complained that sex with their husbands hurt so much , that after a few years never had sex with them again . Many men with a large cock , think that is all they need to be god’s gift to women .
They need to do a lot of foreplay to excite the woman so that she is very well lubricated , they need to be very careful not to ram it in and pound too deep .
Men who are less well endowed need to learn how to really please a woman , to use their tool in the most effective way , whether fast , slow , jirating , pounding , what the individual woman likes .
My opinion is this, if a guy askes you about his size it’s because he needs the reassurance from you and it’s not right for you to say something to him to spare his feelings then tell him it’s not big enough 30 min later
Just dont lie to him and tell him he has the “perfect dick” or tell him its bigger than all of your ex’s cocks, if it’s a small size. He will repeat these statements later on as if they are fact, brandishing his 5 incher, with delusions of grandeur that he is one mustache short of a porno. It changes the mood from sexy to comedy hour. True story. Don’t kill him with the truth but for fuck’s sake spare him the outright lies.
@Genevieve I was going to try that exact same troll but you beat me to it 🙁
I want a woman who loves, appreciates, adores, admires and desires me. My penis is a part of me. It always has been. If I can’t trust a woman to desire my penis and sexual virility, why would I trust her with my heart.
Ladies, if your man catches a whiff of your disappointment in his manhood, you had better believe that exaggerated mental picture will be running through his head. Good luck dealing with his erection problems.
If you are unable to tell him that you love his size, you should show him by immediately pulling down his trow and smothering the little guy with sexy kisses and squeezes and other pleasant activities. This is your time to woman up.
It is an interesting subject. I’ve experienced all sizes of men through college and now a few years after and think that most of the guys that ask that question are either insecure about themselves already or have a different fetish altogether.
None of the women have mentioned any of the other now more open issues with men of color being bigger, too. In my own dating I found myself enjoying men of color more not only because of their larger size but, also because they didn’t need to talk about it. They already have the confidence to know they will satisfy us completely. I found myself not enjoying being with white men as much I think because they more often didn’t have the same confidence and by asking such questions only made me think about the fact that the sex wasn’t going to be as good. So, it would sort of sabotage the sex before it even started.
So, I guess I’m just saying tok the guys that aren’t as well endowed that if you could just have more confidence about what you do have I think that more women would enjoy it. While I have decided that, for myself that since I’ve grown accustomed to large partners (of color) that this is what’s best for me And some of my girlfriends, I know this is not as important to many other women so work on the confidence part and those women are your perfect partners.
Just my thoughts.
I prefer women to be honest. My dick is pretty small, just 4 inches. So I can’t see how a woman could lie and tell me its big! Haha
I guess I’m in the minority, but when I’m dating a woman, I’m always curious what she thinks about my penis size-wise. I’m interested in an honest answer, even if she prefer them larger ideally. Obviously I can’t make it grow, but I am still more interested in knowing my partner’s sexual needs and wants than worrying that I have the most perfectly shaped penis she’s ever happened upon.